|
|
Yes, Happy New Year. My head feels like it's the size of Cleveland. I knew I should not have gone to Hawaii to party with Tyra, 
Barack, Nancy Pelosi, Sarah Palin and Rush. Well, at least I wasn't the one who got the chest pains.
NEW FEATURES:
Movie Reviews NEW! Quote of the Week
Shameless Promos NEW! Feature Articles
Movie Review Archives Contact Me! (Send photos!)
NOTES FROM THE SOCK DRAWER...
Rejoice! I have returned! Due to a weird computer problem, I was unable to update this site for a long time. Many people became despondent and suicidal despite this site's rich archive of movie reviews. However that's over now. Check this site out every week for news, commentary and maybe even some new movie reviews.
And now the NEWS
People have asked me, "Senor Sock, it is a new year. Aren't you going to get rid of all the old jokes?" I would like to, but you keep re-electing them!
The quote of the year came from Homeland Insecurity Chief Janet Napolitano saying "The system worked" after the terrorist trying to blow up the Christmas flight to Detroit from Copenhagen failed. Yes, the system worked IF the system is to lure people on the terrorist watch list onto flights heading to the US, let them become overconfident by letting them bring explosives onto the plane, and then let passengers decide to stop him once he tries to detonate the explosive. The system worked.
More movie reviews are coming! In the meantime, click on the title to check out my new review of the movie "Sherlock Holmes" with Robert Downey Jr.!
If the participants at the Cophenhagen Conference REALLY BELIEVED global warming was caused by manmade greenhouse gasses, do you think they'd fly there in 140 private planes and use over 1200 limosines, so many they have to call out to Germany and France to get them?
As one observer pointed out, the Salahis committed no crime when they crashed the White House state dinner last month. They were merely "undocumented guests" and as such deserve free health care, a place to crash, an open bar, welfare and full rights granted to invited guests.
Reading the list of the women Tiger Woods has had affairs with is like reading Senor Sock's Little Black Book.
At this point wouldn't it be easier just to list the women who Tiger did NOT sleep with?
Hey, Tiger was completely honest with his wife. He TOLD her he was going to play in a "foursome".
Guess he just "played it as it laid".
I KNEW this would happen once he started playing golf with this guy. 
I think most men would have settled for a hole in one. 
The real loser in this Tiger Woods scandal has to be Dave Letterman. He looks like an underacheiver.
My advice to Tiger is to follow the example of the global warming panic crowd after the contents of their e-mails came out showing they were cooking the data. Say the e-mails and texts and voicemails are "just the way fans and gold afficianados talk to him". Insist she is not "sophisticated enough" to understand the messages and that "my wife suspects I'm having an affair" doesn't mean he was and that the phrase "come over and play 'hide the banana'" is a reference to an innocent children's game.
Check out my review of 
Disney's "A Christmas Carol".
Former First Daughter Chelsea Clinton has announced she has gotten engaged to her long time boyfriend. I guess he decided not to get the Lasik surgery after all.
Hey AP fact checkers! Check this: Sara Palin just sold her millionth copy of "Going Rogue".
The AP used to stand for Associated Press, but now it just seems to stand for Anti-Palin. The AP assigned 11 fact checkers to Palin's number one best selling book "Going Rogue". How many did they assign to the Obama Health Care Bill? Something that will affect everyone in the country? If you guessed three, you're too high.
The state of California's budget is $21 billion in the red again, due to the inability of politicians in Sacramento to cut pensions and spending. However they are expecting a big bailout. No, not the Obama administration. Oprah is moving her base of operations to California and pay state taxes.
Hollywood insiders report Dustin Hoffman has walked away from reprising his role in "Little Fockers" without saying why. I think he may have just seen a copy of "Meet the Fockers".
One good thing about the bad worldwide economy: its even caused the Swedish Bikini Team 
to make cut backs.
The Post Office just reported great news! They lost $3.8 billion in the last fiscal year! This is great news because they are estimated to lose $7.8 billion in THIS fiscal year! They feature long lines, slow service and cranky employees. They are considering raising postal rates again and ending Saturday deliveries. And you want the SAME government that runs the post office to take over health care?
Despite Obama's slipping numbers in the Gallup, ABC and CNN polls, he still does well in the Heather Graham pole. 
She's been out promoting the "pubic option".
Nancy Pelosi got the health care bill rammed through the House so fast she didn't realize it included a extra 5% tax
on Botox injections. The Congressional Budget Office figures show if that had been in effect at the start of 2009, Pelosi would owe $36,568.
Sesame Street just celebrated its 40th anniversary on TV! 
Sadly the old neighborhood just ain't what it used to be.
In the House health care bill, there's a section that says people will be fined for not having health insurance. If they refuse to pay the fine, they will be jailed...where they get free health care. Interesting way to get 100% compliance.
A court in Italy ruled that the presence of cruicifixes in Italian schoolrooms was intimidating and ordered them removed. Non-believers and Italian vampires are rejoicing.
RIP Soupy Sales. Soupy was a great friend to puppets and is survived by Pookie (pictured above) who is still alive and well and living in the Old Puppets Drawer in Pasadena, CA.
Soupy guested on "Talk Soup", appearing in the "Mission Impossible" parody in which he boasted "Nobody knows the value of Pie!". Perrin, Alan, and Tom all got pied in the sketch. I have to find a way to try and put it online. Soupy was a very nice man.
The Obama administration tried to cut Fox News out of pool coverage for an administration event, but had to back down when the other networks refused to show up if their brother network was banned. It's not as noble as it sounds. It was the Fox guy's turn to bring the donuts.
In Washington, congress was considering a new bill that would give a $3500 tax credit to pet owners. Does that include Penthouse Pets? 
That's an idea that could be blamed on bush.
In the meantime, wunderwoman ultrababe Suzanne Somers
is working on finding a new cure to cancer using herbal and natural remedies while abandoning traditional chemotherapy. Now I know it seems unlikely but how dumb would scientists look if she somehow succeeeded? Remember, they laughed at the Thighmaster too.
Everything old is new again: CBS is contemplating bringing back "Dallas" with Larry Hagman and Linda Grey repeating their roles as JR and Sue Ellen. In the first episode, JR has fallen and can't get up.
The Disney company is looking at taking legal action against a Australian company using "Ho White and the 7 Dwarves"
to advertise their raspberry ale. No, Disney doesn't mind the Ho White thing. They just do not want to be associated with raspberry ale.
Actress Betty White is also suing the ale makers for stealing the title of her autobiography.
A Berlin brothel is turning green! House of Desire in Berlin is offering a $7.50 discount to customers who bike to the brothel or take public transportation and can show a receipt or a Nobel Prize. Al Gore immediately announced he would visit Berlin on a fact finding mission.
President Obama continues on a roll. Since winning the Nobel Prize he has also won the National and American League Most Valuable Player Award, the Spirit Award for Best Sound Design, the gold medal for the High Jump in the 2016 Rio Olympics, Miss Universe and "America's Top Model".
Exciting news! My latest taped venture, "Citizen Frog" 
is in final editing stages and will soon be available online at both Youtube and artists-in-exile.com. Please go see it and pass along the links to your friends. They will always be grateful.
Look for "Skunkboy" John Henson to guest host an upcoming episode of "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?". Not only will contestants have to answer questions correctly, they will have to cross the big red balls just to get into the studio.
Seattle Seahawks fans and football fans in general should pick up former "Talk Soup" producer Mark Turner's very funny book on the history of the team, "The 12th Man".
To see my review of the movies
"Planet 51" try this link: http://senorsock.mysite.com/custom2_3.html
"The Road" try this link: http://senorsock.mysite.com/custom3_3.html
"A Christmas Carol" try this link: http://senorsock.mysite.com/custom2.html
"Men Who Stare at Goats" try this link: http://senorsock.mysite.com/custom3_1.html
"2012" try this link: http://senorsock.mysite.com/custom3_2.html
And for now, one final gratutious picture. 
Ann Marie Goddard, star of the "Talk Soup" sketch "Oreign Fay Ilm Fay".
And now a little History...
Most American fans know me through watching "Talk Soup" which I was proud to be a part of. Thank you John. 
His new show "Wipeout!" is now in its 3rd season on ABC!
Thank you, Greg.
He continues to impress with terrific performances in major motion pictures.
Unable to access this site for a long time, I started a new site dedicated mostly to movie reviews like the ones you find here! movie reviews 
That site includes reviews from 2006-2009. You should soon be able to access them all from my movie review page on this site. 
Before you leave, click here to check out the chicks!
 |
