You Know You're Studying too Much Chemistry When...
-You can calculate diffusion rates of gases, even gases of the flatulent type
-You mistake ABC as some kind of rare or impossible chemical formula
-Someone asks you your height and you give it an angstrom
-You know your relationships don't work because they're only dipole-dipole attractions
-The only table you know doesn't have legs and certainly cannot be used as household furniture
-You start your alphabet with s, p, d, f
-You spell 'no' as NO3
-You get confused when people refer to a "mole" as either (1) a small area of high melanin content, or (2) a furry living thing burrowed underground
-You know that London forces have absolutely nothing to do with European investigative and security systems
-You define "retort" as a circular glass with a long beak
-An evaporating dish, beaker, erlenmeyer flask, and stirring rod are usual breakfast companions, especially when preparing your favorite morning fruit juice
-You can relate to Dexter in "Dexter's Laboratory"
-You look for "Lyman", "Balmer", or "Paschen" on the box of 50 watt bulbs you just bought
-You stop buying commercial products and start to prepare your own: make-up, soap, astringent, toothpaste, shoe polisher, shampoo, perfume, douche...
-You correct STOP and cross out the O's: "Must have been a typo..."
