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Miscellaniuous is actually a word used by those really really desperate to avoid using the word Unclassifiable, as there's an inherent contradiction in classifying something as unclassifiable.
Mao Tse-Tung was once asked what he thought would have happened if Kruschev had died instead of Kennedy. ``Well,'' he replied after much deliberation, ``I doubt if Aristotle Onassis would have married Mrs. Kruschev.''
Q: What did Clinton say when he first heard about Paula Jones?
A: "Great, NOW she opens her mouth."
A rich matron of society yelled at the cook "This egg is cold! Did you boil it in ide water?"
Jenny watched her mother put cream on her face and asked, "What's that cream for?" The mother said, "It's facial cream to make me look gorgeous." A few minutes later, the mother removed the cream. Jenny stared and then said, "Didn't work, did it?"
... the human brain can operate only as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, we all know, kills off brain cells, but naturally it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker cells, constantly making the brain a faster and more efficient machine.
A farmer was awarded top prize for submitting the winning entry to a slogan contest for a local brewery. When asked how he came up with his slogan: Smith's Beer is better than the Niagara", he scratched his head and said "Well, it's the closest thing to water I've ever tasted."
