Goldwynism

Stolen (not by me) from a 1994 issue of that all-baring South African magazine Scope.

Sam Goldwyn came to the USA from Poland and became a famous Holywood producer. He made these classic manglings of English language now called Goldwynisms.

I'll give you a definite maybe.
I never liked you and I always will.
Include me out.
For your own information, I would like to ask a question.
Anybody who goes to psychiatrist ought to have have his head examined.
I may not always be right, but I am never wrong.
It's more magnificient than mediocre.
A bachelors life is no life for a single man.
In two words im-possible.
Go see it, and see for yourself why it shouldn't be seen.
We have all passed a lot of water since then.
This makes me sore, it gets my dandruff up.
If I could drop dead right now, I would be the happiest man alive.
When I want your opinion I will give it to you.
You are going to call him William? What kind of a name is that? Every Tom, Dick, Harry is called William.

We may mention here that someone commented on the large crowd at the director's funeral : "They just wanted to make sure he was really dead."


The New York Yankees catcher Yoge Berra was also well known for the linguistic screwballs.

Sometimes you can observe a lot by watching.
It ain't over till it's over.
No wonder nobody comes here. It's too crowded.
There are some people who, if they don't already know, you can't tell them.
If you can't imitate him don't copy him.
Half the lies they tell about me aren't true.
Pair them in threes.
one person asked; "What's the time Berra?" Berra replied "you mean right now?"



Previous Language Joke


Back to the Language Joke Page


Home