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You've got two empty halfs of coconuts and your banging them together.

I'll fart in your general direction.

Your mother is a hampster and your father smells of elderberies.

Death awaits you all with nasty big pointy teeth.

Wolf nipple chip, get em while their hot their lovely.

Don't just stand there gawking, like you've never seen the hand of god before

Good evenning ladies and gentlemen, here's a number I tossed off recently in the carabean.

Your a lonny.

Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time.

Nudge nugde say no more.

Whats he do nibble your bum.

Now f**k off
How shall we f**k off o lord?

I cut down trees I wear high heals suspenders and a bra.

What is your favourite colour?

We are the night who say ni.

What have the romans ever given us? ......the aquaduct?

Listen mush if hadn't nailled that bird down, he would of mucled
under those bars and bent them apart with hi little pecker and voom... this parrot wouldn't voom if you put 4 million volts thruogh it!

Now piss off

My brain hurts.

Come back to my place bouncy bouncy.

I hang awake at night Dreaming of being spat at in the face.

Terrific race to romans terrific.

Nugde nugde wink wink say no more.

This has just been retiled so carefull with those weapons.

Don't wear your best sandles.

Nobody expects the spanish inquisition.

He's pinning for the feilds.

If I went around saying I was an empera just cause some moisand bink threw a semitar at me, they'll put me away.

I'm sorry but I'm going to have to shoot you.

What a waste of human life.

I know whare to get it if you want it.

We've got lumps of it round the back, if you want it.

We interrupt this program to be annoying and to make this generally irritating.

Tonight on BBC1 it will be 8:00 followed by 8:15. If you missed 9:45 yesterday it will be on again at a quarter to ten.

Weather report: Tonight it will get dark. But dont worry! It will lighten up in the morning again.

Then you release the man eating tiger.

Well at least it gets you out in the open air.

Good thing I didn't mention the dirty knife.

Don't pass judgement on other people or you might get judged youself.

I think I'm about to have a cardiac arrest.

My hovercraft is full of eals.

£1 for a full sketch or 20p for a quicky.

If I told you, you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me.

My nipples explode in the light.

Eight nods as good as a wink to a blind bat.

If you hadn't nailed it to the perch it will be pushing up the daisies.

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