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A guy I know was quoting some Bible scripture to me and started talking about
the Book of Joel... and I just ruptured my spleen laughing at what imagery
came into my mind....
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In the somewhat distant past....
400 B.C....
There was a guy named Joel...
Not too different from you and me...
He worked in a temple library,
Translating texts for a Pharisee,
He did his job well with a cheery wave,
But his bosses didn't like him so they trapped him in a cave!
"We'll send him cheesy parchments,
The worst we can find,
He'll have to sit and read them all,
And we'll monitor his mind!"
Now keep in mind Joel can't control,
When the manuscript's begin or end,
He'll try to keep his happy thoughts,
With the help of his golem friends!
Golem Rollcall-
Camgolem-
Gypsy-
Tom Servo-
CROOOOW-
If you're wondering how he eats and breathes,
And other mystic facts,
Just repeat to yourself it's just a show,
I should really just relax!
For Mystery Prophetic Theatre 3000!
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Okay, maybe I need therapy, and maybe I'll go to hell for all of this,
but I just couldn't help it!
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Joel : "Hi folks, welcome to the Cave of Love... I'm Joel, and these are
my golems Tom and Crow... say hello, guys!"
Both: "Hello guys!"
Joel: "I shoulda seen that coming. Anyway, I'm in here because-"
Crow: "You know, Joel, we've heard this story a thousand times, and it's
getting pretty worn out!"
Tom: "Yeah! 'Some guy in robes throws another guy in robes into a cave, blah
blah blah...' What makes YOU so special? Jonah had his whale, and Noah had
his ark... 'Joel and his cave'?"
Crow: "Gotta admit, Joel, it is pretty lame!"
Joel: "Geesh, guys, what side of the stalagmites did you two wake up on?"
Crow: "Well, lets see... we were just a pile of rocks and bones, minding
our own buisnesses..
Tom: "... and YOU came along and animated us..."
Crow "...and NOW we have to read horrible, horrible texts while that monk
guy watches us..."
Tom: "If I have to read anymore 'Dingleberry begat Horseapple, who begat
Flyspeck', I'm gonna choke myself!!!"
Crow: "But Tom, your arms don't work."
Tom: "Oh. Well. There goes that idea."
Mystic Voice: "Commercial Sign in 15 seconds..."
Tom: "What's a commercial?"
Joel: "Don't ask. We'll be right back."
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What y'all think? I'm pretty bored here (took a week of leave so I could
take a road trip with my wife, but she couldn't get off work, so I'm here
at home absolutely bored witless). Hope it doesn't stink too bad.
