Theory
Queen's Fan Fiction Hospital
"When it's just too sick to get better on
its own..."
Advice
for Fan Fiction Authors
Fan fiction
is a creative and harmless way for people to interact with their favorite
fictional characters and universes on a number of different levels. The
problem? Many writers, although skilled (or at least potentially skilled),
make grammatical and mechanical errors in their writing that accidently
change the whole meaning of the story. It's a shame to be reading a good
story and be interrupted by a mistake in the grammar. It's very hard to
get back into the flow of the story, and it inhibits the enjoyment of the
reader.
This
page will contain some of the most common (and some of the most cringe-worthy)
errors I've seen, along with corrections. This is not meant to criticize
people's writing, but merely to point out some common errors. There are
some fabulous writers out there who make some silly mistake that changes
the whole tone of their stories. I hope to help prevent that, and to have
a little fun with the errors themselves. Don't feel bad or take it
personally if you see an error from your story up here. None of these
are meant as personal attacks, and -- fear not! -- some of my own errors
are up here as well. We must all have a sense of humor about our
writing as we send our stories off to make their way in the world like
children: some of them will succeed wildly, some will never be above average,
and some will fail. Unlike children, however, you can never produce
too many!
Some
of the errors are from fandoms other than Buffy, but are an example of
an error that many writers make. Many thanks to Grammatica who helped
me compile this list. Other examples are welcomed. If you see
something that should go up here, email it to me at Theoryqueen@fcmail.com,
along with the URL of the site where you found it. Thank you.
Comma
Errors
-
"I, of course
knew that, it dawned me, when I looked at him, so I tell him to hush, it's
no big deal."
Way, way too many commas here!
First, this sentence should be divided into two or three, and as such might
need one comma if any. Possible correction: "Of course I knew
that. It dawned on me when I looked at him, so I told him to hush.
It's no big deal." --Corrected, it's still wordy and redundant, but
at least the unnecessary commas are gone.
Ugh. The proper phrase is
"Suit yourself," meaning that your own actions will see you suited in whatever
situation. The comma shouldn't be there, and "your" should be spelled
out.
Wrong
words
This category is a biggie.
Part of the problem is that, although the words may be spelled correctly
and therefore would not be picked up by the grammar checker in the writer's
word processing program, they're just the wrong words.
They look or sound a little like the right words and many writers don't
realize they're not, but they mean different things. For example
(with italics mine):
-
"I think
you're old enough now to depart my statement of womanly wisdom ..."
This writer doubtless meant "impart,"
which means to deliver knowledge, or teach. "Depart" means to leave,
which as you can see, changed the sense of this sentence a great deal.
This is a common enough expression
that most readers would easily recognize what the writer meant: "One and
the same". It's a little thing, but it changes the meaning and distracts
the reader.
-
"hole-in-the-wall
town with no descent mirrors for miles"
The writer
here bemoans the lack of adequate mirrors, not downwardly mobile ones.
"Decent" mirrors usually hang on the walls and reflect things. "Descent"
mirrors would reflect something or someone's downward passage! Someone
should get one for Joss so he could see what he did to third season.
Many, many
writers are guilty of this one. "Viscous" means slimy. "Vicious"
is the word these writers seek to describe cruel, animalistic vampires
such as Angelus. But then, "viscous" might also describe him when
he's wearing all that hair gel.
Many writers
mix these up too. "Horde" is a large group of people.
"Hoard" means to save up, usually in a miserly fashion. "Whored"
is the past tense of the word meaning to get paid for sex.
Example: She hoards the money she received from the horde of football
players when she whored for them.
-
"He started
hunting the dreads of society. You know the types-murderers,
rapists, wife-beaters..."
This writer
should have said "dregs" of society, which is a common expression likening
lower members of society to the sediment that falls to the bottom of a
coffee cup or wine vat. His/her choice was evocative, if incorrect.
In one sense, it might be taken to mean people worthy of extreme fear,
but in a much more common sense it means a Rastafarian hairstyle, dreadlocks,
or "dreads" for short. If you pictured all the dregs of society wearing
dreadlocks, you weren't alone!
-
"playing
some music on the jute box"
A "jukebox"
plays music when you insert money. "Jute" is a kind of string.
-
"They ...
are tracking a sea monster that prays on people."
This writer either meant "preys"
or has a serious problem with religion. To hunt for food, or to eat
what you've killed, is to "prey" on it. "Prey" is also the name of
the kill itself; however, "Pray" is how you talk to your deity/ies.
-
"he was
late for the fourth time in a roll"
This
writer probably meant to use the common expression for recurring consecutive
events, "in a row," or "on a roll." As it is, however, the word choice
conjures up images of biscuits making him late.
-
"The red
sundress was loose but short, showing her long pail legs."
"Pale" is
the desired word here, as bucket-shaped legs would probably not be shown
off like that.
-
"pouring
over musty books in the library"
In this case, the character would
most likely be "poring" over the books, i.e. studying intently. "Pouring"
over them would get your card pulled in most places, as it means to dispense
liquid from a container.
"Peek" means
to sneak a glance. "Peak" is either to reach a summit, or the summit
itself (this one is used frequently by smut writers to mean orgasm)
"Pique" as a noun means a petulent mood, and as a verb it means to catch
one's attention. Example: "The mountain peak piqued his interest.
As his interest peaked, he peeked over the peak and then stomped down the
other side in a fit of pique." (Did you get all that?)
An INCORRECT
example from fanfic in the context of Buffy having sex: "Buffy
screamed as she peeked..." See what I mean? Sounds as if she
saw a truly frightening sight, when she was actually enjoying herself.
"Rains" is what the weather does
when water comes down from the sky. "Reins" are what you use to control
a horse. "Reigns" is to rule over. Example: "The groom
reigns in the stable, but if he goes out riding and it rains, even he pulls
back on the reins and goes home."
-
"Spike ground
his teeth ... as the news of his sire's eminent arrival sunk in"
Here the writer spoke of Angel's
arriving soon, and should have chosen "imminent" instead, which means will
happen soon. Instead, the writer made it sound as if Angel's arrival
was very important. Example: "The woman speaking next is an eminent
member of society. Her imminent speech will cover a variety of topics.
It's just a few moments away..."
-
"Yeah, I'm
legal," he said, flashing his idea.
I suspect this error is a geographical
one, as not all areas of the country pronounce "idea" with three syllables;
however, he should have flashed his I.D. if he wanted to prove his age
rather than his creativity. Don't you picture this guy with a light
bulb over his head? I do.
-
"her full,
pert breasts ... begged him to ravage them"
Will anyone
join me in saying OUCH!? "Ravish" is the word that non-masochists
would use here, as it means to seduce, to coerce into sex, with a modern
undertone of consent. "Ravage," on the other hand, means to lay waste,
to annihilate, ruin, and destroy.
-
" I see
a woman with velvety black hair, crazed eyes and a scared neck."
Unless the
lady's neck is frightened, it probably has a healed wound. "Scared"
means frightened, whereas "scarred" means having a scar.
-
"Ben felt
[sexually excited] and suppressed a grown..."
"Grown" is the past perfect tense
of "to grow." A "groan" is the sound of sexual excitement.
Unless our Ben is supressing his own growth as a person, he's probably
trying to keep his state of arousal a secret.
-
"You tell
me to dye my hair black and drown it in mouse"
"Mousse"
is the word for a light hair gel. If this writer really did mean
the subject is drowning her newly darkened hair in rodents or computer
hardware, however, the word should have been "mice."
-
"She was
laying
on Angel's bed with her eyes closed, enjoying the felling of his
hands."
A couple of things here:
first, human beings don't "lay" on beds, unless they're laying an object
down on the bed, or getting laid on the bed. What she was really
doing here is "lying" on the bed. Second, unless she
has recently cut them off, she's probably enjoying the "feeling" of his
hands rather than the "felling," which is what lumberjacks do to trees
when they cut them down.
-
"It was
obvious he was gripping about Buffy and her ex Angel."
Don't know
who this character was, but he was probably complaining about Buffy and
Angel, rather than holding them tightly. As far as griping about
them -- haven't we all done that from time to time?
A tragedy
is a terrible event. A travesty is a satire, a spoof, a parody of
something else. INCORRECT example: someone sent out an email asking
for "Giles sites, because I just have one! It's a travesty!"
A tragedy it might have been, but unless the site she had was a spoof of
another one, it was not a travesty.
An "hour"
is a unit of time 60 minutes long. "Our" is a possessive pronoun,
i.e. "That's our boy!" "Are" is a present tense of the verb
"to be." Example: "Dear Joss, Are you going to make Spike a
regular? He's our favorite character. He really livens up the
Buffy hour."
"Vile" is disgusting. "Vial"
is a small jar of liquid. "Viol," is a large stringed instrument.
"Buffy had to drink a large vial of beer after hearing Angel's vile performance
on the viol."
Misplaced
Apostrophes
This
is a common one, too. Some writers evidently think of an apostrophe
as a mark of punctuation inserted into the text to warn readers
of an approaching S.
-
"Look out!
Here come's an S!"
That was an incorrect example,
by the way. Here is another one, taken directly from a fanfic story:
-
"He just
look's at her with a sad expression on his face. This time, Buffy put's
her hand on his cheek and he take's it. They look at each other deeply,
in silence. Willow crack's the door a bit and pop's her head out..."
Singular verbs do not
get apostrophes. "Willow... pops her head out."
Possessive pronouns do
not get apostrophes. "This is its lair," or "This room is hers."
Plural nouns do not
get apostrophes. "There are two vampires."
Possessive nouns, however,
do get apostrophes. "This is Xander's car.
Plural possessive nouns get
one after the S, like this. "This is his parents' basement.
Contractions also get one,
to take the place of the missing letter. "Do not" becomes "Don't,"
and "Should not" becomes "shouldn't, and "she is" becomes "she's."
Example: "They don't notice she's there."
Miscellaneous
Errors for your Reading (dis)Pleasure
For people
whose breakfast experience is truly a sensory one:
-
"Is that
the smell of pancakes I feel?"
For people who have studied
tribal medicine, but not spelling:
-
"a liberal
spread of a concoction made from the mucase from a pregnant..."
This one has to be the
best of all. I think it's an error, but uncorrected it makes the
best pun I've ever seen in fanfic:
-
"They are
character rised as being extremely tall..."