Tonight, my unconventional conventionalists, I bring you the complete lyrics to:

Now sit back, relax and let there be lips........

 

Science Fiction / Double Feature  
Usherette
Michael Rennie was ill
The day the earth stood still
But he told us where we stand
And Flash Gordon was there
In silver underwear
Claude Rains was the Invisible man
Then something went wrong
For Fay Wray and King Kong
They got caught in a celluloid jam
Then at a deadly pace
It came from outer space
And this is how the message ran

Science Fiction - Double Feature
Dr X will build a creature
See androids fighting Brad and Janet
Anne Francis stars in Forbidden Planet
Oh - at the Late Night Double Feature
Picture Show

 I knew Leo G. Carroll
Was over a barrel
When Tarantula took to the hills
And I really got hot
When I saw Janette Scott
Fight a Triffid that spits poison and kills
Dana Andrews said prunes
Gave him the ruhnes
And passing them used lots of skills
And when worlds collide
Said George Pal to his bride
I'm going to give you some terrible thrills
Like a -

Science Fiction - Double Feature
Dr X will build a creature
See androids fighting Brad and Janet
Anne Francis stars in Forbidden Planet
Oh - at the Late Night Double Feature
Picture Show

 

Damnit Janet  
Brad
Hey, Janet, I've got something to say
I really loved the skillful way
You beat the other girls to the bride's bouquet

The river was deep but I swam it (Janet)
The future is ours so let's plan it (Janet)
So please don't tell me to can it (Janet)
I've one thing to say and that's....
Damn it - Janet - I love you

The road was long but I ran it (Janet)
There's a fire in my heart and you fan it (Janet)
If there's one fool for you then I am it (Janet)
I've one thing to say and that's....
Damn it - Janet - I love you

Here's a ring to prove that I'm no joker
There's three ways that love can grow
That's good - bad - or mediocre
Oh J-A-N-E-T - I love you so

Janet
Oh it's nicer than Betty Monroe had (Oh Brad)
Now we're engaged and I'm so glad (Oh Brad)
That you've met Mom and you know Dad (Oh Brad)
I've one thing to say and that's....
Brad - I'm mad - for you too

Oh Brad

Brad
Oh damn it

 Janet
I'm mad

Brad
Oh Janet

Janet
For you

Brad
I love you too....

Brad & Janet
There's one thing left to do....

Brad
And that's....
Go see the man that began it
When we met in his science exam it
Made me give you the eye and then panic
Now I've one thing to say and that's....
Damn it - Janet - I love you

Damn it Janet

Janet
Oh Brad I'm mad

Brad
Damn it Janet

Brad & Janet
I love you

 

Over At The Frankenstein Place  
Janet
In the velvet darkness
Of the blackest night
Burning bright - there's a guiding star
No matter what or who you are

Brad & Janet
There's a light

All
Over at the Frankenstein place

Brad & Janet
There's a light

All
Burning in the fireplace

Brad & Janet
There's a light....light in the darkness of everybody's life

Brad
I can see the flag fly
I can see the rain
Just the same - there has got to be
Something better here - for you and me

Brad & Janet
There's a light

All
Over at the Frankenstein place

 Brad & Janet
There's a light

All
Burning in the fireplace

Brad & Janet
There's a light....light in the darkness of everybody's life

Riff Raff
The darkness must go
Down the river of night's dreaming
Flow Morphia slow let the sun and light
Come streaming into my life

Into my life

Brad & Janet
There's a light

All
Over at the Frankenstein place

Brad & Janet
There's a light

All
Burning in the fireplace
There's a light - light

Brad & Janet
In the darkness of everybody's life

 

The Time Warp  
Riff Raff
It's astounding - Time is fleeting
Madness takes it's toll
But listen closely - Not for very much longer
I've got to keep control
I remember doing the Time Warp
Drinking those moments when
The blackness would hit me -
And the void would be calling

All
Let's do the Time Warp again
Let's do the Time Warp again

Narrator
It's just a jump to the left

All
And then a step to the right

Narrator
With your hands on your hips

All
You bring your knees in tight
But it's the pelvic thrust
That really drives you insane
Let's do the Time Warp again
Let's do the Time Warp again

Magenta
It's so dreamy - oh fantasy free me
So you can't see me - no not at all
In another dimension - with voyeuristic intention
Well secluded - I'll see all
With a bit of a mind flip -
You're there in the time slip
Nothing can ever be the same

 Riff Raff
You're spaced out on sensation
Like you're under sedation

All
Let's do the Time Warp again
Let's do the Time Warp again

Columbia
Well I was walking down the street
Just having a think
When a snake of a guy gave me an evil wink
Well it shook me up, it took me by surprise
He had a pick up truck and the Devil's eyes
Oh - he stared at me and I felt a change
Time meant nothing - never would again

All
Let's do the Time Warp again
Let's do the Time Warp again

Let's do the Time Warp again
Let's do the Time Warp again

Narrator
It's just a jump to the left

All
And then a step to the right

Narrator
With your hands on your hips

All
You bring your knees in tight
But it's the pelvic thrust
That really drives you insane
Let's do the Time Warp again
Let's do the Time Warp again

 

Sweet Transvestite  
Frank
How do you do
I see you've met my faithful handyman
He's a little brought down
Because when you knocked
He thought you were the candyman

Don't get strung out by the way I look
Don't judge a book by its cover
I'm not much of a man
By the light of day
But by night I'm one hell of a lover

I'm just a sweet transvestite
From Transsexual
Transilvania

Let me show you around, maybe play you a sound
You look like you're both pretty groovy
Or if you want something visual that's not too abysmal
We could take in an old Steve Reeves movie

Brad
I'm glad we caught you at home
Ah - could we use your phone?
We're both in a bit of a hurry
We'll just say where we are
Then go back to the car
We don't want to be any worry

Frank
Well you got caught with a flat
Well how about that

 Well babies don't you panic
By the light of the night
It'll all seem alright
I'll get you a satanic mechanic

I'm just a sweet transvestite
From Transsexual
Transilvania

Why don'tcha stay for the night (Night)
Or maybe a bite (Bite)
I could show you my favourite obsession
I've been making a man
Woth blond hair and a tan
He's good for relieving my tension

I'm just a sweet transvestite
From Transsexual
Transilvania

I'm just a sweet transvestite
From Transsexual
Transilvania

So come up to the lab
And see what's on the slab
I see you shiver in antici-pation
But maybe the rain
Is really to blame
So I'll remove the cause
But not the symptom

 

The Sword of Damocles  
Rocky
The Sword of Damocles is hanging over my head
And I got the feeling someone's
Gonna be cutting the thread
Oh woe is me - my life is a misery
Oh can't you see that I'm at the start
Of a pretty big downer

I woke up this morning with a start
When I fell out of bed

All
That ain't no crime

Rocky
And left from my dreaming
Was a feeling of unamiable dread

All
That ain't no crime

Rocky
My high is low - I'm dressed up with no place to go
And all I know
Is I'm at the start of a pretty big downer

All
Sha la la la that ain't no crime

Rocky
Oh no no no no

All
Sha la la la that ain't no crime

Rocky
Oh no no no no

All
Sha la la la that ain't no crime
That ain't no crime

Narrator
Rocky Horror you need peace of mind
And I want to tell you that you're doing just fine
You're the product of another time
So feeling down - well that's no crime

All
That ain't no crime

 Rocky
The Sword of Damocles is hanging over my head

All
That ain't no crime

Rocky
And I got the feeling someone's
Gonna be cutting the thread

All
That ain't no crime

Rocky
Oh woe is me - my life is a mystery
Oh can't you see that I'm at the start
Of a pretty big downer

All
Sha la la la that ain't no crime

Rocky
Oh no no no no

All
Sha la la la that ain't no crime

Rocky
Oh no no no no

All
Sha la la la that ain't no crime
That ain't no crime

Sha la la la that ain't no crime

Rocky
Oh no no no no

All
Sha la la la that ain't no crime

Rocky
Oh no no no no

All
Sha la la la that ain't no crime
That ain't no crime
Sha la la

 

The Charles Atlas Song The Roxy cast version of this song is different and you can read the lyrics here
Frank
A weakling weighing 98lbs
Gets sand in his face when kicked to the ground
His girl splits on him
And soon in the gym
The sweat from his pores as he works for his cause
Will make him glisten and gleam
And with massage and just a little bit of steam
He'll be pink and quite clean
He'd be a strong man - but the wrong man

He'll eat nutricious high protein and swallow raw eggs
Try to build up his shoulders, chest arms and legs
Such an effort if he only knew of my plan
When in just seven days

 Narrator
Boom, boom, boom, boom

Frank
He'd do press ups and chin ups
Do the snatch, clean and jerk
I think dynamic tension must be awfully hard work
Such strenuous living I just don't understand
When in just seven days

Narrator
Boom, boom, boom, boom

Frank
I can make you a man

 

Hot Patootie  
Eddie
Whatever happened to Saturday night
When you dressed up sharp and you felt alright
It don't seem the same since cosmic light
Came into my life and thought I was divine
I used to go for a ride with a chick who'd go
And listen to the music on the radio
A saxophone was blowin' on a Rock 'n' Roll show
And you climbed in the back seat
And you really had a good time

Hot patootie bless my soul
I really love that Rock & Roll

All
Hot patootie bless my soul
I really love that Rock & Roll
Hot patootie bless my soul
I really love that Rock & Roll
Hot patootie bless my soul
I really love that Rock & Roll

 Eddie
My head used to swim from the perfume I smelt
My hands kinda fumbled with white plastic belt
I'd taste her baby pink lipstick and that's when I'd melt
And she'd whisper in my ear tonight she really was mine

Get back in front and put some hair oil on
Buddy Holly was singing his very last song
With your arm around your girl you tried to sing along
You felt pretty good cause
You'd really had a good time

All
Hot patootie bless my soul
I really love that Rock & Roll
Hot patootie bless my soul
I really love that Rock & Roll
Hot patootie bless my soul
I really love that Rock & Roll
Hot patootie bless my soul.....

 

The Charles Atlas Song (Reprise)  
Frank
But a deltoid and a bicep
A hot groin and a tricep
Makes me shake
Makes me wanna take
Charles Atlas by the hand

All
In just seven days I can make you a man

Frank
I don't want no dissension
Just dynamic tension

 Janet
I'm a muscle fan

All
In just seven days I can make you a man

Frank
Dig it if you can

All
In just seven days I can make you a man

 

Touch-a, Touch-a, Touch Me  
Janet
I was feeling done in
Couldn't win
I'd only ever kissed before
I thought there's no use getting
Into heavy petting
It only leads to trouble
And seat wetting

Now all I want to know
Is how to go
I've tasted blood and I want more
I'll put up no resistance
I want to stay the distance
I've got an itch to scratch
I need assistance

Touch-a touch-a touch-a touch me
I wanna be dirty
Thrill me chill me fulfil me
Creature of the night

 Then if anything grows
When you pose
I'll oil you up and rub you down
And that's just one small fraction
Of the main attraction
You need a friendly hand
And I need action

Touch-a touch-a touch-a touch me
I wanna be dirty
Thrill me chill me fulfil me
Creature of the night

Touch-a touch-a touch-a touch me
I wanna be dirty
Thrill me chill me fulfil me
Creature of the night
Creature of the night
Creature of the night
Creature of the night

 

Once In A While  
Brad
Once in a while
She don't want to call you
Speaking on the telephone
And once in your life
She don't want to know you
You look around
The one you found she is gone

And that's all the time
That it takes
For a heart to turn to stone
The sweeter the wine
The harder to make the break
You hear something
About someone you thought you'd known

 So baby don' cry
Like there's no tomorrow
After the light there's a brand new day
And there'll be no pain
And no more sorrow
So wash your face
And phone my place
It'll be okay

And that's all the time
That it takes
For a heart to beat again
So give me a sign
That a lover makes
You look around
The one you found is back again

 

Eddie's Teddy  
Dr. Scott
From the day he was born, he was trouble
He was the thorn in his mother's side
She tried in vain

Narrator
But he never caused her nothing but pain

Scotty
He left home the day she died
From the day she was gone
All he wanted
Was Rock 'n' Roll, porn and a motor bike
Shootin' up junk

Narrator
He was a low down cheap little punk

Scotty
Taking everyone for the ride

All
When Eddie said he didn't like his teddy
You knew he was a no good kid
But when he threatened your life
With a switch blade knife

Frank
What a guy

Janet
Makes you cry

Scotty
And I did

Columbia
Everybody shoved him
I very nearly loved him
I said hey listen to me
Stay sane inside insanity
But he locked the door
And threw away the key

Scotty
But he must have been drawn into something
Making him warn me in a note which reads

 All
What's it say, what's it say?

Eddie / Scotty
I'm out of my heard
Hurry or I may be dead
They musn't carry out their evil deeds

All
When Eddie said he didn't like his teddy
You knew he was a no good kid
But when he threatened your life
With a switch blade knife

Frank
What a guy

Janet
Makes you cry

Scotty
And I did

All
When Eddie said he didn't like his teddy
You knew he was a no good kid
But when he threatened your life
With a switch blade knife

Frank
What a guy

Janet
Makes you cry

Scotty
And I did

Frank
What a guy

Janet
Makes you cry

Scotty
And I did

 

Planet Schmanet Janet  
Frank
Planet schmanet Janet
Tell you once
Won't tell you twice
You'd better wise up Janet Weiss

Your apple pie
Don't taste too nice
You'd better wise up Janet Weiss

I've laid the seed
It should be all you need
You're as sensual as a pencil
Wound up like an 'E' or first string
When we made it
Did ya hear a bell ring?

Y'got a block
Take my advice
You'd better wise up Janet Weiss

The Transducer
Will seduce ya

 It's something you'll get used to
A mental mind-fuck can be nice

You'd better wise up - Janet Weiss
You'd better wise up
Build your thighs up
You'd better wise up

Narrator
And then she cries out

Janet
Stop!!

Frank
Don't get hot and flustered
Use a bit of mustard

All (Voices building)
You're a hot dog
But you'd better not try to hurt her
Frank Furter

 

Rose Tint My World  
Columbia
It was great when it all began
I was a regular Frankie fan
But it was over when he had the plan
To start working on a muscle man
Now the only thing that gives me hope
Is my love of a certain dope
Rose tints my world
Keeps me safe from my trouble and pain

Rocky
I'm just seven hours old
Truely beautiful to behold
And somebody should be told
My libido hasn't been controlled
Now the only thing I've come to trust
Is an orgasmic rush of lust
Rose tints my world
Keeps me safe from my trouble and pain

 Brad
It's beyond me
Help me Mommy
I'll be good you'll see
Take this dream away
What's this, lets see
I feel sexy
What's come over me
Here it comes again

Janet
I feel released
Bad times deceased
My confidence has increased
Reality is here
The game has been disbanded
My mind has been expanded
It's a gas that Frankie's landed
His lust is so sincere

 

Don't Dream It  
Frank
Whatever happened to Fay Wray
That delicate satin draped frame
As it clung to her thigh
How I started to cry
Cause I wanted to be dressed just the same

Give yourself over to absolute pleasure
Swim the warm waters of sins of the flesh
Erotic nightmares beyond any measure
And sensual daydreams to treasure forever -
Can't you just see it

Don't dream it - be it (x3)

 Scotty
Hmmm....We've got to get out of this trap
Before this decadence saps our will
I've got to be strong and try to hang on
Or else my mind may snap
And my life will be lived for the thrills

Brad
It's beyond me
Help me Mommy

Janet
God bless Lilly St. Cyr

 

Wild And Untamed Thing  
Frank
I'm a wild and an untamed thing
I'm a bee with a deadly sting
Get a hit, and your mind goes ping
Your heart'll thump and your blood will sing
So let the party and the sounds rock on
Gonna shake it till the life has gone
Rose tint my world
Keep me safe from my trouble and pain		 Riff Raff
Frank N Furter
It's all over
Your mission is a failure
Your lifestyle's too extreme
I'm your new commander
You now are my prisoner
We return to Transilvania
Prepare the Transit Beam

 

I'm Going Home  
Frank
On the day I went away

All
Good bye

Frank
Was all I had to say

All
Now I

Frank
I want to come again and stay

All
Oh my

Frank
Smile and that will mean I may

I've seen blue skies
Through the tears in my eyes
And I realise
I'm going home

Every where it's been the same

 All
Feeling

Frank
Like I'm outside in the rain

All
Wheeling

Frank
Free to try and find the game

All
Dealing

Frank
Cards for sorrow, cards for pain

I've seen blue skies
Through the tears in my eyes
And I realise -
I'm going home
I'm going home
I'm going home
I'm going home

 

Super Heroes  
Brad
I've done a lot
God knows I've tried
To find the truth
I've even lied
But all I know
Is down inside

All
I'm bleeding

Janet
And super heroes
Come to feast
To taste the flesh
Not yet deceased

 And all I know
Is still the beast

All
Is feeding

Narrator
And crawling on the planet's face
Some insects called the Huamn Race
Lost in time
And lost in space

All
And meaning

 

Science Fiction / Double Feature (Reprise)  
Usherette
Science Fiction - Double Feature
Frank has built and lost his creature
Darkness has conquered Brad and Janet
The servants gone to a distant planet
Oh - at the Late Night Double Feature
Picture Show - I want to go - Ohh -
To the Late Night Double Feature Picture Show