Copyright 2000 --- Robert Baer Jr. The Space Rovers -- "Easy Riding Rovers" DISCLAIMER Road Rovers characters, names, situations and the Road Rovers universe are the property of Warner Bros. I, nor this script/story are connected with Warner Bros. in any way, shape or form. This document may not be publicized or reproduced in any way, shape or form. It must remain fully intact and may not be altered in anyway. It is strictly used for not-for-profit entertainment purposes only, and is not intended to infringe on any Copyrights. This story is written by Robert Baer Jr and the characters Bob, Dot, Wild Bill Bluejay, Babs Finchly, Princess and the Gila Monster are all Robert Baer Jr's creations, copyright pending, 1998 - 2000. The Space Rovers -- "Easy Riding Rovers" The scene is a lonely stretch of the highway in Arizona. Driving by on two Harvey-Davidson motorcycles which have the Gila Monster, Princess, Bob and Dot riding them. Flying high above them are two Bird Rovers, 'Wild Bill' Bluejay and his girlfriend Babs Finchly. All of them are wearing white safety helmets with two-way radios inside them, so they chat along the way. BOB (happy): This was a great idea of yours, Mr Gila Monster! I loved taking that tour of the La Braya Tar Pits, kinda reminds me of home back on Jurrassia. DOT (happy): I agree! It was good to see all of my old friends at the firehouse again, even though they could hardly believe I was the dog that used to be their mascot! BABS (upset): I just wish Wild Bill hadn't shouted FIRE and threw that bucket of water on the fire chief! WILD BILL (giggles): Hey, can I help it? She looked like she was on fire! DOT (sternly): Haven't you ever seen a human with red hair before? WILD BILL (wonders): Well, come to think of it.....nope! PRINCESS (concerned): Darling, are we going to stop for dinner soon, I'm starving. WILD BILL (laughing): Yeah, don't look like I'm going to find too many worms out here in the desert! GILA MONSTER (sternly): They's bound to be some eatin' place out here somewheres BABS (happy): That's good! I'm hungry too! DOT (concerned): We can't stay out here too much longer, the Canius Minor is leaving tommorrow and ... GILA MONSTER (interrupting): No sweat, my dalmation pal! We'll grab a quick bite to eat and return to Alpha Base before it gits dark! WILD BILL (happy): Hey, Gila Monster! I see some buildings up ahead, maybe they have a restraunt there! GILA MONSTER (nods): I see it too, Bill! Let's all pull in! Bob and the Gila Monster park their motorcycles in front of the largest building. It is a roadside 'bar' that looks very 'run down.' Princess and Dot shutter a little as they remove their helmets. Wild Bill and Babs land beside them and take their helmets off also. PRINCESS (looks up at Gila): Darling, are you sure we want to eat here? GILA MONSTER (wide grin): YEP! This is my kind of place! WILD BILL (points): Must be a famous place! See? The owner's name is up in lights in the window! DOT (shakes head): No, Bill. I'm sure the owner's name isn't 'Budweiser'. WILD BILL (ponders): Come to think of it, that is a weird name, even for a human! BABS (concerned): I hope the food is better than the decor! GILA MONSTER (motions): C'mon y'all, let's go in! When the six friends enter the place, they see several black wooden tables with chair, a pool table in the 'back' and a bar with eight stools in front of them. Behind the bar is a rather gruff looking man wearing a tee shirt that showed his all of his arm tattoos. He snorts as he sees them approach the bar. BARTENDER (angry): HEY! We don't serve freaks here! GILA MONSTER (waves his 2 x 4): Who is you callin a freak? BARTENDER (furious): DON'T THREATEN ME, LIZARD FACE! BOB (smiles): All we want to do is have dinner, sir BARTENDER (surprised): Sir? Well, at least your son has some manners! Listen, kid, this ain't exactly a four star restraunt. We got plenty of drink here! WILD BILL (happy): Great! I'd like a tall glass of ice water! BABS (nods): Me too, sir! BARTENDER (snorts): Not water, you morons! I serve beer and hard liquor! Now order some drinks or get out of here! WILD BILL (confused): Hard liquor? If it's hard, how can you drink it? BARTENDER (angry): Look, you blue feathered freak, leave or I'll have you all thrown out! BOB (upset): Why are you acting so rude, sir? BARTENDER (furious): I'll show you rude, green boy! (shouts): VERNON!!! Into the room walks a very tall, muscular, bald man with a sinister grin on his face. When Wild Bill sees him, he takes out a pad of paper and hands it to him WILD BIIL (happy): WOW!!! IT'S MR CLEAN!!! I never thought I'd ever meet you in person! I love those commercials of yours! Can I have your autograph? How do you get your head to shine for the camera like that? As Wild Bill continues to rant, Vernon takes one of his huge hands and grabs him around the neck and lifts him off the floor. VERNON (deep, booming voice): Boss! Want me to throw these clowns outta here? As the bartender nods his head, suddenly several motorcycle gang members enter the bar. BARTENDER (big smile): Looks like the regular crowd's here, Vernon, let them take care of these freaks! Vernon drops Wild Bill and walks back to the pool table. Soon, a dozen of the gang members surrounds them. The Gila Monster lifts up his 2 x4 but puts it back down as Princess looks at him and shakes her head. ONE OF THE GANG MEMBERS (shouting): Look what have here! Two mutts, two lizards and two stupid looking birds! DOT (sternly): We were just leaving..... As Princess turns around to get her purse, one of the gang members grabs her tail. Before she can react, the Gila Monster smashes the man over the head with his 2 x 4, causing him to fall backwards to the floor. GANG MEMBER (angry): So, you wanna fight? Let's get it on! Several of the gang members pull out handguns, when Bob sees this, he closes his eyes and concentrates. Within seconds, all six of the Rovers begin to glow and suddenly disappear from sight. They now find themselves outside standing beside their motorbikes. GILA MONSTER (shocked): Hey! What happaned? BOB (frantic): I'll explain later! Let's get outta here! GILA MONSTER (growls, swings 2 x 4): I'd rather beat those goobers up! PRINCESS (shakes head): It's not worth it, Gila! Besides, we were looking for a place to eat, remember? The motorcycle gang members run outside, one of them points and shouts, "there they are!" as they all run towards them. GILA MONSTER (furious): IT'S CLOBBERIN' TIME!! BOB (shakes head): No, I have a much better idea! Bob begins to glow and within seconds has 'grown' into his dinosaur 'mode.' The angry mod looks up at the huge green brontosaurus with fear in their eyes. BOB (thundering voice): I'm SO hungry! I wonder if humans taste better by the dozen? Bob gives out a huge dinosaur roar that causes all of the motorcycle gangsters to scatter in all directions towards the desert. GILA MONSTER (laughing): Look at those idgets run! WILD BILL (happy): I didn't know humans could run so fast! DOT (laughs): Normally, they don't! BABS (looks up at Bob): That's some trick, Bob! BOB (smiles, booming voice): Thanks! Looks like they're all gone now! The bartender and Vernon rush outside to see what all the commotion is about. When they see the large dinosaur in their parking lot, they too run away in terror. WILD BILL (shouts): That's what you get for not giving us any ice water! GILA MONSTER (points): Looks like Mr Clean ain't so brave no more! DOT (looks up at Bob): Good job, honey! I'll get your spare uniform so you can shrink back to normal size! BOB (smiles, booming voice): Ok, thanks Dot! Bob hides behind the other side of the building, shrinks and puts his Space Rover uniform on. PRINCESS (looking around): Hey, where's Wild Bill? BOB (rushing over to join them): I don't know... (points): Wait! There he is! Wild Bill lands in front of the motorbikes. WILD BILL (happy): We're ready to leave now! BABS (points): Wild Bill! I see that smirk on your face! What did you do? WILD BILL (laughs): I decorated some motorcycles! BABS (shocked): You didn't! All of them look over at the place where the other motorcycles are parked. PRINCESS (turns head): That's disgusting! DOT (turns head): Ewwwwwwwwww! GROSS!!!! BOB (turns head): That's rather unsanitary! GILA MONSTER (laughs hard): That's jist what them dingledoofs deserve! BABS (furious): WILD BILL BLUEJAY! WILD BILL (laughs): Hey, I'm a bird, remember? Just doing what comes naturally! PRINCESS (shakes head): I think I just lost my apettite! DOT (nods): If I wasn't so hungry, I'd hurl! GILA MONSTER (laughs): You dogs sure have weak stomachs! Ok, let's mount up and get going! Still gotta find a place to eat at! BOB (nods): Good idea! So Bob, Dot, Princess and the Gila Monster mount their motorbikes and speed away. Wild Bill and Babs put on their safety helmets and take off. Soon they reach Yuma and are having a fast food meal on an outdoor patio. They notices a number of police and emergency vehicles speeding by. GILA MONSTER (wonders): I wonder where all of them folks is runnin' off to in such a hurry? Many people rush out of the restraunt, get into their vehicles and follow the police cars going out of town. Princess walks over to a crowd of fleeing people to ask what was going on. She returns to their table giggling. BOB (wondering): So tell us, Princess, what's going on? PRINCESS (laughing): Well, someone called in to the state police.....and reported a huge alien had attacked a local drinking establishment! Scientists are being sent there to examine the huge alien 'footprints' GILA MONSTER (looks at Bob, smiles): I wonder who made THOSE! PRINCESS (still laughing): They're even sending off the strange white 'substance' that the 'alien' used on them off to the university science lab for analysis! DOT (laughs): Maybe they can get a government grant to study it! WILD BILL (rolls over laughing): Alien bird droppings! Wait till the National Enquirer hears about this! BABS (concerned): Should we tell them the truth? All six of them look at each other and shout out in unison "NA!" They all laugh and continue eating their meal. -----------------------------------------------------------------------