Copyright 2000 -- Robert Baer Jr. The Space Rovers -- "A Galaxy Far, Far Away -- Part 1" DISCLAIMER Road Rovers characters, names, situations and the Road Rovers universe are the property of Warner Bros. Star Trek and Star Trek Voyager characters, names, situations and the Star Trek universe are the property of Paramount Studios, I nor this script/story are connected with Warner Bros. or Paramount Studios in any way, shape or form. This document may not be publicized or reproduced in any way, shape or form. It must remain fully intact and may not be altered in anyway. It is strictly used for not-for-profit entertainment purposes only, and is not intended to infringe on any Copyrights. This story is written by Robert Baer Jr and the characters Fydo, Boomer, Rasputin, Saundra, Alexander, Grunt, Daisy, Abdullah, Bob, Cactus Jake, Marie, Francis, Calypso, Sheena, Bruno, Molly, Deborah, Orchid, Dot, Luigi, Sophia, Lao Zi, Su Li, Claudia, Sno-wie, Numbia, Hojo, Shamansta, Derby and Poncho are all Robert Baer Jr's creations, copyright pending, 1999 - 2000, Cobber is a creation of Mike Browner. The Space Rovers -- "A Galaxy Far Far Away -- Part 1" The scene is the bridge area of the U S S Voyager, the Star Fleet vessel which is currently 'marooned' deep in the Delta Quadrant of space and many, many light years from Federation space. Captain Katherine Janeway is in the captain's 'chair', next to her is her First Mate Commander Chakoty. Also on the bridge is Lt. Tom Paris at the helm controls, Commander Tuvok (half Vulcan, half human) at his science station, Ensign Harry Kim at his station and Chief Engineer B'Lonna Torrez (half Klingon-half human) watching over Harry's shoulder. Also standing on the bridge is Seven of Nine (former Borg drone), Neelix (Tallaxian) and the Doctor (a hologram). They are ready to test a new piece of technology that Tom and Neelix had just acquired from some space traders a few short days ago. JANEWAY (looks at B'Lonna): B'Lonna, are we ready to begin testing it yet? B'LONNA (looking over Harry's shoulder): Affirmative Captain! The artificial wormhole device is online and operating within normal parameters. JANEWAY (smiles): Excellent, Tom, Neelix, I must commend both of you for getting this device for us! Did you have much trouble dealing with the Immorai? NEELIX (rambling): No, no trouble at all.... well.... almost no trouble..... actually it was rather difficult to.... TOM (laughs): I did all the talking, Captain. Neelix just stood there and nodded. I got to admit, it wasn't easy dealing with a race of people who look like huge, humanoid goldfish! JANEWAY (smiles): But the important thing is we got it! And all we had to trade for it was a few extra pods of anti-matter to get it. SEVEN (sternly): How we acquired the device is irrelavant. B'Lonna and I have sent long hours fitting it into our deflector dish array, we were also required to use Borg technology in order to make the device fully functional. CHAKOTY (startled): Borg Technology? Is that a good idea? TUVOK (coldly): Commander, I have studied the holodeck simutations that B'Lonna and Seven ran on the artificial wormhole device. I am convinced that our implimentation of this device will successfully open a direct passage back to the Alpha Quadrant HARRY (interrupting): And good old Earth! DOCTOR (sarcastically): Well, I only hope that this thing works! I had to be taken offline during the simulations that were ran, do any of you realize what it's like to be deactivated because of .... JANEWAY (smiles): Your complaint is noted, Doctor, but we had to make certain that this device was safe to use before trying it out. I apologize for the inconvenience. DOCTOR (slight smile): Apology accepted, Captain. But in the future would you give me advanced notice before shutting my program down, I was in the middle of finishing the weekly crew physicals when my 'plug' was pulled! SEVEN (sternly): We needed access to the main holographic emitter immediately, there was no time for advanced warning and ... JANEWAY (looks at both of them): That will do! At ease! (looks over at Harry): Harry, is the test probe ready for launching? HARRY (pushing buttons): Probe is ready, Captain! JANEWAY (looks at Tuvok): Tuvok, activate the artificial wormhole generator..... Harry, launch the probe when the wormhole is at it's apex! TUVOK (pushing buttons): The device has been activated. A vortex is now forming three hundred point seven kilometers off our starboard bow. JANEWAY (looks forward): On screen! The entire bridge crew watches as they see a wormhole forming, it is growing larger and larger by the second. HARRY (pushing buttons): Launching probe! As the other watch, the probe enters the wormhole. Suddenly, the entire ship shakes and the wormhole begins to send out flashes of white energy resembling lightning TUVOK (pushing buttons): The emitter array is overloading, attempting to compensate... JANEWAY (surprized): B'Lonna! What's happening? B'LONNA (angry): One of the Borg fusion coils has burned out, it's causing the entire wormhole to become unstable! Another shockwave hits Voyager, Seven of Nine, Neelix and the Doctor fall to the floor with the Doctor falling on top of Seven. DOCTOR (smiles): We have to stop meeting like this! People will begin to talk! SEVEN (pushing the Doctor off of her): Your crude attempt at humor is unacceptable! TOM (laughing): Looks like she's falling for you, Doc! SEVEN (sternly): My feelings for the Doctor are irrelavant! JANEWAY (shouting): Tuvok, shut it down, NOW! TUVOK (pushing buttons): Powering down the wormhole device .... Another shockwave hits the ship. Tom looks at the viewscreen and sees a large object flying out of their end of the wormhole at a high rate of speed. TOM (pushing buttons): What the hell was that? HARRY (looks at console): It's a Defiant class space ship bearing two hundred kilometers off our port bow! TOM (pushing buttons): That ship flew out of the mouth of the wormhole faster than a speeding bullet! NEELIX (standing up): A speeding bullet? TOM (nods): Old twentieth century slang CHAKOTY (smiles): You are our expert on ancient Earth history! TUVOK (pushing buttons): The device is now offline. HARRY (looking at console): The wormhole is breaking down TUVOK (sternly): Captain, I advise that we move Voyager to a safer distance away from.... JANEWAY (nods): Understood, Lt Paris, back us off! TOM (pushing buttons): Warp engines are offline, reversing at full impulse... Voyager slowly backs away as the wormhole 'breaks down' and vanishs. JANEWAY (shouting): Damage report! B'LONNA (looks at console): Warp engines are offline, main power is barely functioning, isometric and long range sensors are also down. CHAKOTY (shouts): Dispatch repair crew immediately! SEVEN (looks at Janeway): Captain, permission to go to engineering to repair the damaged Borg .... JANEWAY (nods): Permission granted! Harry, what more can you tell us about that spaceship that came through the wormhole? HARRY (pushing buttons): Not much, our sensor array went down before I could get a good scan on it JANEWAY: Tom, set a intercept course, we're responsible for bringing it here, we better see what we can do the assist them. Can you put that ship on the screen? TOM (smiles): In two shakes of a lamb's tail, Captain! NEELIX (confused): Lamb's tail? TOM (pushing buttons); More twentieth century slang, Neelix. I have the vessel, here it is! JANEWAY (looks at it): Interesting, I wonder.... Tom, magnify the image! TOM (pushing buttons): Aye aye, Captain! HARRY (surprised): Look! There's writing on the ship's hull, and it's in English! JANEWAY (shocked): English? TOM (pushing buttons): Magnifying further The bridge crew gasp when they see the large Road Rover symbol and the words beneath it reading "CANIUS MINOR". Now the scene shifts to the bridge of the Canius Minor. Everyone on the bridge (Persia, Alexander, Saundra, Boomer, Whitey, Bruno, Cactus Jake) are all unconscience on the floor, except for Bob and Grunt, who are sitting at the helm controls and have just brought the ship to a halt. BOB (frantic): I gotta get to Bruno's station and see if any of the rest of the crew can be reached. Grunt, you .... Grunt is kneeling beside Persia, gently trying to awaken her. GRUNT (softly): Grrrrrrrrr Growl? Grrrrrrrrrrrrr GROWL! BOB (at Bruno's station): Attention! Anyone that can hear the sound of my voice ..... oh great! PA system is down! Bob and Grunt are shocked as they watch Janeway, Tuvok and Tom beam onto the bridge. GRUNT (furious): GRRRRRRRRRRRRR GROWL!!! GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!! BOB (stands up): Invaders! Bob uses his mental powers to form a small force field around Janeway, Tuvok and Tom. Tuvok has his tri-corder in hand. TUVOK (sternly): Interesting, a mentally projected force field has just surrounded us GRUNT (points laser pistol): GRRRRRRRRRRRRR! GROWL!!! TOM (sarcastic): Well, this isn't exactly going like we thought it would.. BOB (sternly): Are you people responsible for this? Our ship's systems have been damaged and ... JANEWAY (calmly): Please, let me explain. I am Captain Catherine Janeway of the Starship Voyager, this is my chief of security Tuvok and Lt Tom Paris. We mean you no harm ... BOB (nods): I'm Lt Commander Bob of the Space Rover vessel Canius Minor, but answer my question, did you cause all of this? TOM (looks around): Is this some sort of interplanetary dog pound or something? Grunt growls fiercely at Tom and attempts to grab him, but the force field prevents this. TOM (shouts): Down boy, down..... JANEWAY (sternly): That will do, Leiutenant! (calmly): I don't know how to fully explain this...er...Bob....but Persia begins to sit up, Grunt rushes over to her and begins licking her face repeatly. TOM (laughs): Doggies in love, isn't that cute! BOB (angry): I don't like your attitude, Tom! Stop insulting my friends! JANEWAY (looks at Tom): Not one more word, and that's an ORDER! PERSIA (Grunt helps her stand up): Status report! (sees Janeway, Tom and Tuvok): Bob, take your force field down. Captain Janeway and her crew are here to help us. And Tom Paris, stop imagining how I would look in white lace longerine! GRUNT (furious): GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!! PERSIA (telepathicly to Grunt): Heel Grunt, that's an order! The other Space Rovers on the bridge awaken and slowly stand to their feet. Persia quickly telepathically tells them the entire story. TOM (shocked): But how did you .... JANEWAY (surprised): How did you know our names? PERSIA (smiles): I'm telepathic, Katherine. Forgive the rather rude introduction, but my crew had no way of knowing your intentions. I'm Captain Persia JANEWAY (calmly): Pleased to meet you, Captain. As I was saying... PERSIA (smiles): You were attempting to use a artificial wormhole generator, it malfunctioned and sucked the Canius Minor into this region of space, right? TUVOK (shocked): Fascinating... a canine humanoid with telepathic abilities JANEWAY (nods): You certainly can read minds, Persia! Persia introduces the other Space Rovers to Janeway, Tuvok and Tom. PERSIA (shocked): Katherine, you are your crew are from the twenty fourth century! Oh dear.... WHITEY (sternly): Captain, that means we've not only traveled through space, we've also traveled through time as well. TUVOK (raises eyebrow): Time? Where exactly are you beings from? WHITEY (sternly): We are from Earth....twentieth century Earth.... TOM (smirks): You gotta be kidding! Talking dogs and...and.....whatever Bob is never existed on Earth, not even in our time! JANEWAY (looks at Tom): I told you NOT ANOTHER WORD! PERSIA (smiles): It's alright, Katherine. Lt Commander Bob is Jurrassian, the rest of us are cano-sapiens, created by our Road Rover master! TOM (mumbles): A flying doghouse.... TUVOK (interrupts): This, 'flying dog house' as you call it has a lot of highly-advanced technology. May I ask how you Space Rovers acquired all of this .... PERSIA (smiles): We'll have plenty of time to answer all of your questions later. Captain Janeway, you have transported over members of your crew aboard my ship! JANEWAY (nods): Yes, Persia. Our sensors were down and we saw your vessel floating in space and ... PERSIA (smiles): It's alright, Katherine. I just hope that we can inform the rest of our crew of your peacefuls intentions... The scene shifts to the engineering section of the Canius Minor. B'Lonna Torrez and Seven of Nine have beamed there, and are using their tri-corders to study the ship's engines and power grid. B'LONNA (smiling): Whoever these beings are, they have warp drive! SEVEN (sternly): But this power grid configuration has a design I nor this tri-corder are familiar with B'LONNA (nods): Well, they've certainly using something other than anti-matter or dilythium for power, that's for sure. As they are speaking, Molly and Hojo tackle them from behind, knocking them both to the floor. MOLLY (furious): What are you two no-goodniks doing to MY engines? B'lonna throws Molly off of her and reaches for her phaser. Shamansta tosses a handerchef over it and shouts 'viola', making it disappear. Seven strikes Hojo in the face, sending him to the floor. Sophia sees this and tackles Seven from behind, putting her hands behind her and tying them up with loose wiring. Molly is so furious, she punchs B'lonna several times in the face and stomach. B'lonna is very surprised when she swings a single punch at Molly and it passes right through her body. B'LONNA (shouting): What are you? Some sort of hologram? MOLLY (furious): I am Lt Molotov, this is MY engine room and no one invited YOU here! As this time, Persia, Grunt, Whitey, Cactus Jake, Janeway, Tuvok and Tom enter the engine room. Grunt jumps in between B'lonna and Molly and shakes his head at them. PERSIA (shouting): STOP THIS! LT MOLOTOV, ENSIGN SOPHIA, CADETS HOJO AND SHAMANSTA, HEEL! TOM (runs over to B'lonna): You just can't stay out of trouble, can you? B'LONNA (wipes her bleeding mouth on her sleeve): Ask that crazy black doglady with the Russian accent! She started it! MOLLY (Grunt holding her back): NO ONE INVADES MY ENGINE ROOM! LET ME AT HER! PERSIA (angry): Lt Molotov! That's enough! (turns to Janeway): Forgive my crew, Catherine. There seems to be a misunderstanding here.. SEVEN (shouts): That is becoming increasingly apparent... PERSIA (shouts): Ensign Sophia! Let Seven of Nine up off the floor and untie her, now! SEVEN (surprised): You've accessed my cerebral array! JANEWAY (smiles): It's alright, Seven, Captain Persia is telepathic PERSIA (nods): That's right, Seven of Nine. I can understand your frustration. The Borg has never encountered cano-sapiens before, have they? SEVEN (standing up, sternly): Cease accessing my cerebral array! COMPLY! PERSIA (turns to B'lonna): So, you're Voyager's chief engineer! You and Molly have that in common, along with your short tempers! B'lonna hisses at Molly, Molly growls back. TOM (laughs): Sure! They're identical twins! They even growl alike! B'LONNA (angry): TOM PARIS!! TOM (looks over and winks at her): Just kidding, darling! JANEWAY (looks at Persia): This isn't exactly the way our crews should be working together. PERSIA (nods): I agree, I have a few suggestions... The scene switches to the galley of the Canius Minor, Persia last log entry plays in the background as several Star Fleet personnel are scene dining with the Space Rovers. PERSIA (recorded message, voiceover): Captain's log, supplemental. Repairs are underway to both the Canius Minor and the USS Voyager. Per Captain Janeway's suggestion, members of her crew have been interacting with member of our own. She and I agreed that having any Space Rovers visit Voyager was out of the question, since this could contaminate the time line, assuming the Canius Minor can be returned to the past. Other than some minor agruments between B'lonna Torrez and Lt Molotov, our crews seem to be getting along surprisingly well together. My senior officers will be meeting with hers in an hour to see if, between all of us, we can come up with a way of sending us back to our own time. End entry. In the galley, Cactus Jake and Tom Paris are seated together, B'Lonna and Flash take their trays and join them at their table. TOM (happy): Let me see if I have this straight, Cactus. You were born in Texas? CACTUS JAKE (smiles): That's right, partner! My former owner has... er... had a big ranch there! TOM (puts hand on Jake's shoulder): Don't worry, pal! We'll find a way to send you back home! B'LONNA (walks over and kisses Tom): Hi honey! (sits down): This ship of yours is really fascinating! FLASH (walks over and kisses Jake before she sits down): Thank you, B'lonna! B'LONNA (sips coffee): And you say you and your sister Daisy designed this entire vessel? FLASH (takes a bite of bread): That's right, everything that y'all sees around here my sister and I put together! TOM (staring at Flash and Jake): Flash, are you and Cactus Jake, well... seeing each other? CACTUS JAKE (big grin): We sure are, Tom! I loves my little hushpuppy! FLASH (smiles): And I love you too, handsome! TOM (laughs): Guess what they say is true, opposites DO attract! B'LONNA (elbows Tom): And what did you mean by that? TOM (nervous): Oh, nothing, dear! Nothing at all.... At another table, Seven of Nine, Neelix and Harry Kim are dining with Daisy, Rasptuin, Whitey, Boomer and Saundra. NEELIX (happy): This food is excellent! What do you call this again? RASPUTIN (smiles): This is our famous fish sticks with macaroni and cheese! NEELIX (points with fork): And these small, round green things? RASPUTIN (smiles): Peas, those are called peas, And beside them is fruit jello and ... NEELIX (nods): I knew about the jello, I serve that on Voyager from time to time. I must meet your cook, perhaps he and I can swap recipes! SEVEN (sips coffee): That would violate Captain Janeway's orders! NEELIX (shakes head): Seven, how could exchanging a few recipes change the future? SEVEN (sternly): If you proceed, I will report you to the captain HARRY (looks as Seven): C'mon seven, what harm would it do? This is food we're talking about here, not replicators or transporter arrays DAISY (smiles): We got a matter teleporter! HARRY (shakes head): But you're from the twentieth century! How could you possibly have transport technology? DAISY (smiles): We acquired it from the Mataxians! SAUNDRA (laughs): More like, stole it from them! BOOMER (angry): They owed it to us! After all, they tried to kill us and the Captain and ... SEVEN (sternly): You also possess warp engines and a advanced power grid powered with something called Barium. Did you 'steal' this technology as well? HARRY (gives Seven an angry look): SEVEN!! DAISY (smiles): It's alright, Harry! The Barium generator was Bob's creation, and my sister and I invented our warp engines as well as the hyperspace drive, invisiblity shield, artificial wormhole generator .... HARRY (interrupts): You mean you Space Rovers have a working wormhole generator? DAISY (smiles): Sure do, Harry! It works great! SEVEN (nods): I have seen their wormhole generator, indeed, it is far superior to our own HARRY (excited): Then why not copy their design? SEVEN (sternly): Because it has a Barium core, and we have no Barium HARRY (sadly): Oh... Coming through the doors of the galley are the Doctor being taken by the arm by Sheena, who continues to ramble. SHEENA (continues): So then I treated Roberto's wounds, and it was after that that King Rhinon named HIM Prime Minister and sent Milex off the prison! That's how it all happaned, Doctor! DOCTOR (rolls eyes): How....interesting. By the way, are you on some sort of medication or have you comsumed any large quantities of sugar in the past hour? SHEENA (laughs): Of course not, silly! I've been talking to you the entire time! I have a lot more stories about how I've treated patients out here in space! DOCTOR (rolls eyes): Lucky me.... by the way, I don't want to appear rude, but I'm a holographic projection, I don't eat so why have you (tries to free his arm) brought me to the galley? SHEENA (smiles): Because it's a great way to meet all of the other Space Rovers! Your Captain did order you to 'mix and mingle', right? DOCTOR (nods): I suppose you're right, Sheena. Alright, I will accompany you to your table SHEENA (smiles): Great! (looks through glass) Today is fish stick day! I love fish sticks! Of course, the last time I had them... (turns sad): ....my boyfriend Cobber was here with me.... (starts crying, hugs Doctor): I MISS MY COBBER!! I MAY NEVER SEE HIM AGAIN!!!! (bursts into tears) DOCTOR (looks around, disgusted): Swell! We find a ship full of canines and I'm stuck with the one who is overly chatty, lovesick and psychiotic! At another table, Calypso and Fydo have brought all the Rover children in for lunch, they are accompanied by Naomi Wildman, a lillte girl from Voyager. CALYPSO (smiles): I am so glad dat your mother be letting you come here and play wit me little ones, Naomi! NAOMI (smiles): Thank you, Miss Calypso! Sometimes it's so lonely on Voyager with no other kids there to play with or even talk to. GRETA (smiles): Naomi, wanna see my doll collection after lunch? YURI (excited): No, play a game of table soccer with me! JOSEPHINE (excited): No, no! You play monopoly with us! PENG (smiles): Or a rousing game of ping pong? NAOMI (smiles): Wait a minute, all those things sound like fun, but I don't know if I'll have time to do all of it! CALYPSO (nods): Dat be a good point, Miss Naomi! I say find something all of you can do together wit her, yes? DENG (smiles): Excellent suggestion! VANNI (nods): I likea that idea! The scene switchs to the hallway, where Persia, Janeway, Chakoty, Alexander and Whitey walk towards the galley. PERSIA (smiles): Captain Janeway, I hope you like fish sticks! JANEWAY (confused): Fish sticks? PERSIA (nods): That's lunch for today! ALEXANDER (notices Whitey's sad look): Whitey, is something bothering you? PERSIA (turns to Whitey): Commander Whitey, don't make me read your mind, what's the matter? WHITEY (sadly): I have a theory about our present situation CHAKOTY (anxious): Yes, tell us. WHITEY (sadly): If my theory is correct, it will be impossible for the Canius Minor to return to our own time.. PERSIA (shocked): Why not? WHITEY (sadly): It is my contention that we are not only from a different period of time, we are also from a different universe, a different reality all together... Persia, Janeway, Chakoty and Alexander look at Whitey in sheer shock and disbelief ------------------------------------------------------------------------- to be continued.....