Copyright 2000 --- Robert Baer Jr. The Space Rovers -- "Go West, Space Rovers! -- Part 1" DISCLAIMER Road Rovers characters, names, situations and the Road Rovers universe are the property of Warner Bros. I, nor this script/story are connected with Warner Bros. in any way, shape or form. This document may not be publicized or reproduced in any way, shape or form. It must remain fully intact and may not be altered in anyway. It is strictly used for not-for-profit entertainment purposes only, and is not intended to infringe on any Copyrights. This story is written by Robert Baer Jr and the characters Otto, Starlight, Fydo, Boomer, Rasputin, Saundra, Alexander, Grunt, Daisy, Abdullah, Bob, Cactus Jake, Marie, Francis, Calypso, Sheena, Bruno, Molly, Deborah, Orchid, Dot, Luigi, Sophia, Willfong, Lao Zi, Su Li, Claudia, Sno-wie, Numbia, Hojo, Shamansta, Derby and Poncho are all Robert Baer Jr's creations, copyright pending, 1999 - 2000. Mystic McLab is a creation of Bart Walls. The Space Rovers -- "Go West, Space Rovers! -- Part 1" The scene is aboard the Space Rover shuttlecraft Dogstar. Persia, Alexander, Grunt, Whitey, Deborah and Cactus Jake are returning to the Canius Minor after a high level diplomatic meeting with Garn-lid on the Pronate homeworld. As Cactus Jake and Grunt pilot the shuttle, Alexander and Deborah are asleep in their seats, Whitey is seated behind a console scanning the area. Persia takes this opportunity to record another log entry. PERSIA (into mic): Captain's log, supplemental. The six of us were received as heroes on the Pronate home world. We had a very nice dinner meeting with their new leader, Garn-lid, who expressed his deep gratitude to us for destorying Q-BO. We will be returning to the Canius Minor in one hour to begin another star charting mission on the Jurrassian frontier. End entry. CACTUS JAKE (giggles): Them Pronates are really great folk! They can sure throw a party! WHITEY (sternly): They seem to excel in social functions. I am eager to return to the Canius Minor, are we traveling at our maximum speed? CACTUS JAKE (giggles); Settle down, partner! This shuttlecraft can barely do warp one, we'll be back... WHITEY (upset): I am Commander Whitey, not your 'partner', Leiutenant Jake! CACTUS JAKE (sadly): Sorry sir, I didn't mean nothin' by it... PERSIA (smiles): Whitey, stop worrying, you'll be back together with your wife soon. WHITEY (nods): Yes, Captain. (shakes Deborah awake): Ensign, how was my wife's last physical? DEBORAH (startled awake): Er.. Whitey... she and the litter are healthly..... you asked me that .... two hours ago..... WHITEY (nods): Of course, Deborah, I apologize.. CACTUS JAKE (giggles): If I may say so, Commander, you're as nervous as a long-tail cat in a rockin' chair factory! WHITEY (sternly): I am concerned for my pregnant's wife health, that is not unusual ALEXANDER (waking up): Whitey, you seem to be obsessed with her. Relax, Sno-wie is doing well and our medical staff is seeing to it she and the unborn children have the best of care. GRUNT (nods): GRRRRRRRRRRRRR GROWL!! GRRRRRRRRRRR!!! WHITEY (smiles): It appears that Commander Grunt concerns with your opinion, Alexander DEBORAH (yawning, stretches): Are we there yet? VOICE FROM INSIDE SHUTTLE (scary, deep voice): OF COURSE NOT, YOU MISERABLE MUTT!! DEBORAH (scared): Did...did.... did you hear that? WHITEY (growling): Cactus Jake, if this is another one of your practical jokes.... CACTUS JAKE (shakes head): No sir! That wasn't me! PERSIA (stands up): There's another presence in this shuttle..... VOICE (female, happy): RIGHT YOU ARE, EL CAPITAN!! Suddenly appears in the middle of the shuttle is Mystic McLab, this time she is dressed in a Space Rover uniform identical to Persia's. PERSIA (angry): Mystic McLab! What are you doing here? MYSTIC (yawns): Hey, I got bored just hanging around earth, so I thought I'd pay all of you a visit! WHITEY (confused): But you were destroyed during our last encounter, we all saw it! MYSTIC (laughs): Do you think you can get rid of me THAT easily? CACTUS JAKE (sarcastic): You're harder to shake than a fly from a horse! MYSTIC (smiles): Whoa, smooth comeback, Tex Critter! CACTUS JAKE (stands up): How about you and me wrangle, you loco sidewinder! Cactus Jake throws a punch at Mystic, but his fist passes right through her. Grunt jumps at her but passes through her and falls to the floor. MYSTIC (laughs): Am I that transparent? (points): But Cowboy Cowpie here has given me a great idea! Let's all have some adventure! And this time, those two shapeshifters and lizard boy won't spoil my fun! Sudddenly, the six Space Rovers find themselves in a desert area. Just over the horizon, they all see what appears to be an old western town. Persia and the others then look at themselves, Mystic has changed their clothes. Grunt, Cactus Jake and Whitey are all dressed in traditional cowboy attire. Alexander is also dressed in western clothes, but with a black 'derby style' hat instead of a cowboy hat. Deborah and Persia are dressed in long, western looking dresses. PERSIA (shouting out): MYSTIC MCLAB!! THIS ISN'T FUNNY!! RETURN US TO OUR SHIP!!! Mystic walks out from behind a huge boulder, this time she is wearing a 'cowgirl' outfit complete with a gunbelt. MYSTIC (laughing): This is going to be SO entertaining! You see, this is not an image I just created, all of us are in the Colorado Territory in the year 1870. (talks western style); How do you folks like your new duds? ALEXANDER (furious): I look like a old cogger! MYSTIC (laughs): You ARE an old cogger, Alex! PERSIA (upset): So, why have you brought us here? MYSTIC (floating upward): I'm giving you Space Rovers a sporting proposition. Somewhere in that town ahead of you is a time crystal. I'll give you until high noon tommorrow to find it, if you succeed in securing the crystal, you'll be returned to your present time. However, if you fail, you'll be stuck here.. FOREVER!!! CACTUS JAKE (angry): That ain't fair! We all look like dogs! They'll shoot us on site! MYSTIC (smiles): I've taken care of that! I've cast a spell on you six so that any human that looks at you will see you as human. The spell also will allow Grunt to be understood by anyone he encounters, too. GRUNT (speaking plainly): How is this possible?.... What?..... I can speak clearly?... MYSTIC (nods): Hey, I do have a heart, don't I? Oh, and one more thing, here are two good friends to help you also! BEHOLD!! Mystic waves her hand and suddenly, a horse drawn cart appears before them. There is a pure white horse harnessed to it and a very familiar looking cano-sapien at the reins, dressed like John Wayne. PERSIA (shocked): OTTO!!! ALEXANDER (nods): And that's Starlight pulling the cart! OTTO (confused): This is highly irregular. STARLIGHT (upset): Hey! What am I doing pulling a cart? MYSTIC (laughing hard): So, the bionic horsy doesn't like to be a work horse! TOO BAD!!! (smiles at Otto): Welcome to the wild west, Otto! You sound so much like John Wayne, now here's your chance to BE John Wayne! OTTO (confused): I fail to comprehend your meaning, Mystic McLab! MYSTIC (laughs): You're a smart dog, you'll figure it out! Remember, you have until high noon! I'll be watching, so no funny business! When Mystic vanishes, Persia and the others walk over to Otto and Starlight. PERSIA: We have to find something Mystic calls a time crystal. Can you two scan the town ahead for it? OTTO (shakes head)" Without knowing what we are searching for, how can we find it? PERSIA (sternly): Scan for any unusual energy readings or power signatures STARLIGHT (sternly): Scanning........... no unusual readings in a twenty kilometer range. ALEXANDER (angry): What if this is a trick? What if there is no time crystal? PERSIA (sternly): It exists, old man. I read Mystic's mind, she is telling the truth WHITEY (excited): Did you also discover it's location? PERSIA (shakes head): She hadn't hid it yet. That's why she disappeared, so she could place it in the town somewhere DEBORAH (sadly): We have to find that crystal! If we're stuck here, I'll near see Hans and Greta again! WHITEY (angry): Nor will I witness the birth of my children! GRUNT (points): Captain, may I suggest we search the town with our bare hands? PERSIA (nods): I agree, Grunt. We have to play this little scenario out. Remember, we have to watch what we do or say, it could alter history. Space Rovers, until further notice let's not address each other by rank. We need to quietly search this town, find that time crystal and get back home! OTTO (nods); I concur, Persia. Everyone, climb aboard this cart and we'll ride into town. PERSIA (looks at Starlight): I also suggest that you not speak at all. There's no way we could explain a talking horse in 1870 Colorado. Use your internal transmitter to speak to me and Otto, ok? STARLIGHT (sadly): Ok Persia. Guess I'll have to act like a normal horse during this entire mission. OTTO (shakes the reins): Giddy UP! In a matter of minutes, the Rovers ride into town. They stop in front of the train station as Persia, Grunt, Alexander, Deborah, Cactus Jake and Whitey climb down. PERSIA (points): Otto, take Starlight to the stable on the other end of town. The rest of us will begin the search. Act natural, don't do anything to draw attention to ourselves! The Space Rovers split up. Persia and Grunt go one way, Alexander and Deborah go another while Cactus Jake and Whitey walk over to the other side of the street in front of a saloon. CACTUS JAKE (points): Hey! There's a lot of people in there! Maybe we can talk to some of the locals and see if they've seen the time crystal. WHITEY (nods): That is an excellent suggestion, Cactus Jake! As Cactus Jake and Whitey enter the saloon. Alexander and Deborah begin to search the street for any signs of the crystal. ALEXANDER (peeps through barber shop window): Nope, nothing there. DEBORAH (frightened): Alexander, I'm scared. They humans look very mean, especially the males! ALEXANDER (nods); This was a very 'uncivilized' era of American history. Continue the search. Two burly looking men approach Alexander and Deborah. They smile and remove their hats. MAN 1 (smiles): Mister, your daughter is mighty purdy! MAN 2 (nods): I sure do agree! ALEXANDER (bewildered): oh, thank you! MAN 1 (grins): How about we take her out on the town, pops? MAN 2 (pulls out a gun): Sure! You don't mind, do you, old man? DEBORAH (angry): I don't want to be with either of you! MAN 1 (frowns): Now you've gone and insulted us! MAN 2 (angry): Come with us NOW, liitle lady, or gramps dies! The first man grabs Deborah by the arm, Alexander shoots a quick electrical bolt from his hands, electofying the man's gun, he is shocked badly when he reaches for it. Deborah hits the other man with her fist, knocking him down. ALEXANDER (shouts): We better make a run for it! Alexander and Deborah run away and duck into the general store as the two men chase after them. Meanwhile, Persia and Grunt walk over to the schoolhouse, where the teacher has just let her class out for the day. PERSIA (smiles): Excuse me, miss, may I have a word with you? MARY (nods): I'm Miss Mary Smith, how may I help you? PERSIA (smiles): My name is Persia, and this is my husband Grunt. We are new in town and were wondering if by chance you've seen an item we are seeking. MARY (waves at the departing students): What is this thing you'r lookin for? GRUNT (excited): It's called the time crystal and we need it to return to the year ... Persia elbows Grunt in the ribs before he can finish his sentence. MARY (confused): Time crystal? Return to what year? PERSIA (interrupting): He means it was a very good year for crystal! Are there any antique shops in this town? MARY (points): Well, if what you're lookin' for is in this town, it's gotta be in Ike's General Store, over there! GRUNT (western accent): Much obligied, ma'am. (takes Persia by the arm): C'mon, WIFE! (snickers) As Persia and Grunt walk away, the scene now shifts back to the saloon where Whitey and Cactus Jake are seated at a table, sipping sasperilla and looking around. WHITEY (whispers to Jake): So far, we've met no one who has ever heard of the time crystal CACTUS JAKE (whispers to Whitey): Yep, I reckon we come up empty handed, let's go! When Whitey and Cactus Jake attempt to leave the saloon, the bartender rushes over and blocks their path, holding a shotgun. BARTENDER (angry): HEY! You two weren't leaving without paying, were you? WHITEY (shocked): No, of course not sir. How much money do we owe you? BARTENDER (angry):: Both of you had six drinks, that'd be eight bits! CACTUS JAKE (confused): Eight bits? BARTENDER (furious): One dollar, you fool! WHITEY (hands him a five dollar bill): There you are, my good man. Keep the change. BARTENDER (studies the bill): HEY! Is this some sort of joke? It has Abe Lincoln's picture on it! CACTUS JAKE (shocked): Er... well, that's just a joke! (grabs the bill): We'll give you some gold instead! BARTENDER (aims shotgun at Cactus Jake): I say you two are lying! Whitey quickly removes a button from his shirt, using his mind powers, he changes it into a nugget of gold. WHITEY (hands it to the bartender): Here you are, that should pay for our drinks! BARTENDER (looks at it, smiles): That's gold alright! (lowers shotgun): Why didn't you give me this in the first place? You boys must've struck it rich! CACTUS JAKE (smiles): Let's just say we suddenly found some gold, right Whitey! WHITEY (nods): That's an appropriate way to say it, Cactus Jake! PERSIA (telepathic message to Whitey and Cactus Jake): Meet us at Ike's General Store... CACTUS JAKE (smiles): Now, if y'all will excuse us, we have to meet some friends and ... As Cactus Jake is speaking, a man puts his hand on his shoulders. Cactus Jake and Whitey turn around to see three very gruff looking cowboys standing there. COWBOY 1 (evil grin): So, you two stuck it rich, huh? WHITEY (stuttering): Thats not exactly accurate sir.... COWBOY 2 (pulls out gun): We want the rest of your gold, NOW!! COWBOY 3 (pulls out gun): What's it going to be? Gold, or LEAD? CACTUS JAKE (turns to Whitey): As Hunter would say, yet another unexpected twist... bummer! ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- to be continued.....