CHAT TRANSCRIPTS
Oct 28th 1999 - This is our most recent on-line chat, although not very well announced or populated it did offer a chance to test the new chat software and peak into the current events in Enduro's life.
5-21-1999  - Our first chat with Fontzepontze, it was done in a different chat program and took place around the time of the release of the Burgers first CD, Escape From Detroit...
<Moderator> Hello Bastardos
<Juan Bastardos> Greetings...
<Moderator> Do you have any questions for Fontzepontze?
<Juan Bastardos> Why hops and barley? Why were they chosen above  all other grains?
Enduro Fontzepontze> I'm afraid I do not know the answer to your question. Although I would guess it was a feasable filler material to use in the country of beers' origin.
<Moderator> Fontzepontze is the lead singer of the Motor City Burgers and he is trying to field questions of a musical nature
<Juan Bastardos> How has GG alan influenced your sound, man?
Enduro Fontzepontze> I'm not a big fan of GG's sound but I do appreciate his accomplishments and his mastery over the social norm of importance on looks and posessions. In the way of performance I like to fly by the seat of my pants similar to GG, making sure no one knows what to expect.
Enduro Fontzepontze> Conformity is the hobgoblin of feeble minds.
<Moderator> Thank you for that provoking question, Juan!
Enduro Fontzepontze> I'm drinking Black Velvet.
<Juan Bastardos> Halloween candy...
Enduro Fontzepontze> I don't have much of a sweet tooth...  I enjoy the razor blades though.
<Juan Bastardos> Where are the chicks?
<Moderator> This is all that has shown up for the  talkingtrashrecords.com and come.to/fontzepontze sponsered webchat so far. More should arrive of both genders soon, Enduro and  Juan
[Thu Oct 28 21:18:57 EDT 1999] Denny has no profile.
<Moderator> Hello Denny, Fontzepontze is currently fielding questions.
<Juan Bastardos> Moderator, how do you know these things?
<Moderator> Previous on-line chats with Fontzepontze and other Motor City Burgers have been wwll recieved.
<Moderator> Pardon me.
Enduro Fontzepontze> That's okay, Moderator, I can only type so fast
[Thu Oct 28 21:20:45 EDT 1999] Dr. Pepper: pokemon galore double click on my name
<Moderator> Hello Dr. Pepper, Fontzepontze is currently fielding questions.
Enduro Fontzepontze> Hi Pepper and Denny
<Moderator> 25 minutes remain.
<Juan Bastardos> Do you endorse cannabalism? 'the flesh eating song'
Enduro Fontzepontze> That song is supposed to be a little tongue in cheek... Although, I do not endorse cannabalism directly, if someone were to have some human flesh already prepared I would have to take a taste.
[Thu Oct 28 21:29:39 EDT 1999] Portnoy has no profile.
<Portnoy> higwai.
<Moderator> Hello Portnoy, Fontzepontze is currently fielding questions for the next 20 minutes.
<Juan Bastardos> molem
<Portnoy> Are all the stories about Fontze & eggs true?
Enduro Fontzepontze> I eat eggs almost every morn if that is what you're referring to.
<Portnoy> Wellll, I meant the rumors.. you know...
<Juan Bastardos> the 911 call...
<Portnoy> Ah ha!  I'm not the only one to hear of it.
Enduro Fontzepontze> I'm sorry but I will not..  I mean I do not know what you're talking about.
<Moderator> Both applets have to be open at the same time, Portnoy
<Portnoy> Yeah, I found out the hard way.
<Moderator> There are 15 minutes remaining in the on-line forum.
<Juan Bastardos> Any plans for a multimedia burger releases?
<Portnoy> I'm still waiting for word on the groupie application I filled out.   :(
Enduro Fontzepontze> We are set to appear on a Troma Pictures DVD which will be available in limited release. There are also talks of a soundtrack appearance.   It's all in the works hopefully soon.
<Juan Bastardos> Troma... hmmm good match
<Portnoy> Appear as in background music, or will you mix it up with the Toxic Avenger some?
Enduro Fontzepontze> We will also be on the "Bring It To Jerome" show very soon.
Enduro Fontzepontze> The film is already complete and I'm afraid we do not appear.
<Portnoy> Damn.  FUCK TROMA.
Enduro Fontzepontze> Write to Troma and tell them how you would like to see the Toxic Advenger hand the motor City Burgers an untimely and messy death in the next film.
<Portnoy> They should re-cut the damn thing then.. splice you in. If  Lucas can do it, Troma can.
Enduro Fontzepontze> Thank you, Portnoy! I agree but would be happy to help in any capacity that I can.
<Portnoy> Any truth to the rumors of the Burgers being the "Hobo Band" at Cedar Point next year?
Enduro Fontzepontze> I'm afraid not but if you'd like to email our manager I'm sure we'd be a perfect fit for a family theme park.
<Portnoy> Assuming Y2K doesn't destroy the earth, of course.
<Moderator> There are 10 minutes remaining.
<Portnoy> Oh, I agree totally.  Imagine the possibilities..
Enduro Fontzepontze> As a young man I applied at Henry Ford Museum as a "mascot" but the position was already filled and had a waiting list
<Portnoy> Would you be the Edsel?
Enduro Fontzepontze> I was going to be the chair lincoln was shot in.
Enduro Fontzepontze> Instead I took a job cleaning 25 cent movie theater booths.
<Portnoy> Oh yes, in the secret wing.
<Portnoy> Any other film projects in the works, Enduro?
<Juan Bastardos> Is it true you once worked as a coloring book author?
Enduro Fontzepontze> That was not HFM related.  They have IMAX porn now.
<Portnoy> I've heard nasty rumors about a snuff film...
Enduro Fontzepontze> I am working on a screen play called "Think Fast, Whitey" about a neo-nazi run future and the afroclad man from the 70's who travels through time to save humanity.
Enduro Fontzepontze> I have colored several Waffle House placemats while on the road, Juan.
<Portnoy> Enduro, what's your favorite Pokemon?
<Moderator> Only one more question, gentlemen.
<Portnoy> Does that count as my last question?
Enduro Fontzepontze> Hmmm, the slutty one?
Enduro Fontzepontze> I'll allow another question, Moderator.
<Moderator> One more.
<Portnoy> I was just wondering... hmm.. lemme try to come up with another one...
<Juan Bastardos> just one more?
Enduro Fontzepontze> Hey, one more each, I don't care!
<Moderator> Your call, Enduro.
<Juan Bastardos> What was the name of the big fish in the film 'On Golden Pond'?
<Juan Bastardos> And by this question ye shall be measured
Enduro Fontzepontze> I never saw the movie but I'll go with Moby Fonda.
<Portnoy> Are you aware we're missing UPN's Wrastlin' right now? No  wonder this place is so emtpy... You need to talk to your manager about better timing.
Enduro Fontzepontze> I am watching the wrestling as we speak, Portnoy! I have a multimedia room.
<Portnoy> Tell me the truth, Wrestling's all real, right?
<Moderator> The online chat has concluded. I would like to thank everyone for their time, especially the Impeccably Dressednuro
    Fontzepontze. Thanks.
<Portnoy> Nice spelling, Moderator.... You sure you're in the right room?
 
The following is a transcript from an on-line chat that was held on 5-21-99, shortly following the release of the Motor City Burgers debut CD...  Escape From Detroit.
Moderator: Okay folks, Enduro has been kind enough to spend a half hour with us so let's all keep our questions simple and to the point so everyone gets a chance...
Enduro Hi, everyone!  It's great to be here!
Johnboy9 Hi Enduro, I really love the new CD Escape From Detroit...  Can you tell us about it?
Enduro Sure thing, Johnboy!  We recorded it all within really just a couple of days at Tempermil with Tony, who was a great guy to work with and you should check out his band, Deathgirl.com he really knows his stuff and made recording the record so easy...  We didn't think we'd be able to record so many songs but we did!  Most of them were in one take, I hope it doesn't show too much...  We went in with the idea of putting about 6-10 songs down but we all worked together so well we cranked out about 16 there and did a couple more with Mike Hastey from Walls of Jerricho at the Loft....  I really recommend both of these guys, as well as drinking a lot of booze during your session... 
Lukeofjudea Hey Fontzepontze, you are such an incredible singer, how do you do it?  And how can I be as cool as you?
Moderator: Only one question at a time, Luke!
Enduro Well, before every show or session I like to stare at a picture of Frank Sinatra for a few minutes to really get me in the mood...  Then if there is time I like to boss the sound guy around to make sure he knows I'm the boss and my voice demands his full attention.  Then, I like to get all liquor up in the back of our Suburban.  Oh, and leave him be moderator...  Sorry, Luke, you'll never be as cool as me.
GaryGnu Rumor on Detroitmusic.com is that you're working on a television show?
Enduro That's right, Gary...  Me and Hochi and Sal from Perpetual Hype Engine are working on a Talk/variety comedy show with sketches here and there.  Look for it soon on public access...
Jerome Don't forget about my show...
Enduro That's right, we've also filmed a segment on the Bring it to Jerome show that will be on public access around the country very soon!  We do 6 songs including two new ones not on the record, Everything I want to do is Illegal in Utah and Big Mutha Honey Thrusta...
Jay Z Is it true that Burgers are good but ass is better?
Enduro Yes, I'm afraid you're right, Jay...  The Burgers are good but if you have a chance to get a good piece of ass instead of going to one of our shows, I say go for it, nothing wrong with that...  If you can turn out that piece of ass and then hit the show in time to see us, I say that's way better.  I'd also like to think that some of you are having sex while listening to our new record, Escape from Detroit...
Moderator Only 15 minutes left...
WendyOWillfan Where is the beef?
Enduro Not sure.
Rockbottom2 We hear you're a big wrestling fan, Fontze, can you tell us some of your favorite wrestling superstars?
Enduro Oh, that's a hard one...  I really like Ric Flair, the Rock, Scott Hall, Torrie Wilson, the Godfather, Chris Benoit, Eddie Guerro, Lord Steven Regal, Curt Hennig, Bret Hart and Chris Jerricho.  Matter of fact, I just got to meet Ric Flair, he was a nice guy and we talked for a while.  I also met Goldberg but he's boring and so are his matches.
FancyFrannie What happened to all your long hair in the on-line photos?!
Enduro I got sick of it.  I'm going for a 80's Ric Flair look now.
Rockbottom2 Who is your least favorite wrestler?
Moderator Only one question!
Enduro Shut up!  I hate Hogan, I could kick out of that leg drop anyday.
HotBigMac What are some of your favorite bands that you've played with?
Enduro Well, I'd like to play with the bass player from Hole, haha!
HotBigMac Serious!
Enduro Oh, okay, I like the Workhorse Movement, PHE, DOC, NiSH and Shutter [they've since change their name to Agia, editor], Broadzilla and Powerface...  Geez, I know there are more but I'm loaded right now!
Sauceking What have you been drinking?
Enduro NyQuil!  I'm on probation!
Sauceking For what?
Enduro Umm, Moderator?
Moderator ONE QUESTION!
Moderator 5 minutes left
Kielbasa Are the Burgers planning on shooting any videos?
Enduro Yeah, we'd really love to but right now we just don't have the budget, we all run Talking Trash Records ourselves and we're still fledging.  Hopefully we'll be able to do everything in house ourselves like Cash Money records.  I love that new "Back That Thing Up" video.  Hochi and I can't believe how cool the story board is!
Moderator One more question!
Hardinggirl Will you have sex with me?
Enduro Maybe, fill out our groupie application!
Moderator Okay, that's all the time Fontzepontze has today...  We'd like to thank everyone for stopping bye and especially thank Enduro himself!
Enduro Aww, shucks, no problem!  I'd like to thank everyone for being here and asking such great questions!  You are all quality human beings, I sincerely love you all and I wish you luck in everything you do...  like buying our record at Desirable Discs I-III, Rock of Ages or Toys and Noize!
Moderator Feel free to stay and chat among yourselves...
Sauceking What a dick...
Kielbasa Yeah no kidding, phoney ass wanna-be rock star
HotBigMac I hope he drowns in his own vomit someday.
WendyOWillfan Where's the beef?
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