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 Hallucinogenic Cheetos
Chapter One ~~~Boredom~~~
Kaze: I'm bored. There has to be something better to do then just sit around like this.
Duo: There are better things. We just can't think of any.
Kaze: So what should we do?
Duo: Wanna go play videogames or something?
Kaze: Nah. Besides, I always beat you.
Duo: Not true! I beat you once!
Kaze: Yeah, at Mario Golf because I hate that game and quit halfway through.
Duo: So what can we do to entertain ourselves?
Kaze: *thinks for a minute* I know! Let's play jokes on the others.
Duo: You mean like practical jokes?
Kaze: Or unpractical. *Two smile evilly at each other* to the laboratory! *Duo and Kaze run off to the house's main staircase. Suddenly a secret door shows up and they go inside reveling a laboratory with lots of cool stuff*
Duo: What shall we do to them this time?
Kaze: It has to be better that last time.
Duo: *evil smile* Yeah… so what does that leave us with?
Kaze: *thinks while looking around the laboratory then notices a bag of Cheetos sitting on a table* I got it! *Whispers something to Duo*
Duo: O.k. let's do it! (Animorphs' bad luck curse)
Chapter Two ~~~a while later~~~
Kaze: I think it's done. We need someone to test this on.
Duo: Andrew!
Kaze: Yeah, the "Guinea Pig"! I'll go get him! *Walks off and comes back wheeling a giant hamster cage with a little boy in a Ram's t-shirt running on the wheel*
Duo: *grabs a few Cheetos* C'mere Andrew. *Duo coaxed the "Guinea Pig" over to the bars near him and gave him the Cheetos*
Andrew: Yeah Cheetos! *Eats the Cheetos then immediately starts to mime out playing a beanbag toss game*
Kaze: It works!
Duo: Who shall be our first victim then?
Kaze: Mariel! She's been in bed for like, two months. She needs some action. C'mon! *Duo grabs the bowl of Cheetos and runs after Kaze to Mariel's room. Kaze walks in with the bowl of Cheetos* Hey Mariel! Hey Quatre! (Quatre was sitting and talking with Mariel) What's up?
Mariel: Not much. I've only been sitting in the same place for two months.
Kaze: That sucks.
Mariel: What did you want?
Kaze: I wanted to give you some Cheetos.
Mariel: Why are you giving me Cheetos?
Kaze: Because… um… they're good for you. *Hands her the bowl*
Mariel: *wearily* o.k?
Quatre: Oh cool Cheetos! *Takes one Cheeto at a time carefully eating them and doesn't get any cheese dust on his hands (FREAK!!!)* I feel all funny… *gets up and runs out of the room*
Chapter Three ~~~Quatre goes first~~~
Quatre: *runs up to sunglass minion (Abdul) and rips off his fez hat. He instantly drops dead because if Quatre's minions loose their hats they instantly die. Quatre then puts the hat on himself* my name is Abdul.
Rashid: No master Quatre. You are Master Quatre.
Quatre: Noooo *shakes his head* I am Abdul, worshiper of Master Quatre. I want to go to Georgiaaaaaaa!
Rashid: (because he worships the man he must obey) All right Master Quatre. We can go to Georgia if you want to. *Quatre and the 39 minions get on a plane to Georgia and are now there because I said so*
Quatre: Is this Georgiaaaaaaaa?
Rashid: Yes Master Quatre.
Quatre: Yippie! Georgiaaaaaaa!
Man in airport: Hey! Those guys have fez hats! Georgians HATE fez hats! Get them! *Everyone in the airport from Georgia attack them and the others just continue with their business*
Quatre: Owie!
Chapter four ~~~Back to Mariel~~~
Mariel: That was weird. I guess I'll have some of these Cheetos. *She eats a handful of the Cheetos and the effects show immediately* Weird Cheetos. *Runs off into another room down the hall that just happened to be Quatre's youngest sister's room. She looks in the closet and grabs a funny little pink dress and fake fairy wings and put them on. She grabs a huge bag of glitter and a funny little wand with a star on the end off the dresser before running out to the horse coral* Horseys! *She lets all the horses out into a field and starts to run around all the horses throwing glitter everywhere* I am the horse fairy! I'll make these horses immortal by sprinkling them with my happy dust! *Other pilots show up about now to watch Mariel (- Quatre)*
Trowa: *points to Mariel* what is she doing?
Uranus: I really don't know. *Sweatdrops from everyone but Duo and Kaze who are laughing to hard to do so*
Chapter five ~~~A little bit later~~~
Kaze: That was so funny! Let's give some Cheetos to the others!
Duo: Heero! We should give them to Heero!
Kaze: Yeah! *Magically has the bowl of Cheetos and hands them to Duo* Here you give them to him.
Duo: O.k. *they run off to where Heero and Uranus are* Hey buddy what's up?
Heero: Nothing. Go away.
Duo: Aw, c'mon Heero, we're better friends than that.
Heero: No we're not. Go away.
Duo: All right I can tell when I'm not wanted. Here *hands Heero the bowl of Cheetos* have some Cheetos.
Heero: Why are you giving me Cheetos?
Duo: Um… because you told me to.
Heero: No I didn't.
Duo: You didn't? Oh well you can have them anyway.
Uranus: *who was gloping Heero (big surprise)* Oh Cheetos! *Eats them and runs off into the kitchen. Heero stays*
Chapter six ~~~Uranus is the cook~~~
Uranus: *looks in front of her and acts like she's talking to someone* Hello and I'm Martha Stewart. Welcome to my show. *At this point Kaze and Duo are watching along with the other pilots (that are left)* Today we will be learning how to make a semi-necular bomb. *Wufei walks up to see if she's o.k. And when he does…* Billy, get off my show! No one wants to see you! Only me! *Beats Wufei away with a really big metal spoon*
Wufei: What is up with that woman?
Uranus: Now you just take the accelerator and attach it to the spring. *Sweatdrops from those not laughing again*
Chapter seven ~~~Heero and Relena~~~
Heero: *thinks to himself* what was with that? *Without thinking he grabs some Cheetos and stuffs them in his mouth. (Uh oh…) runs up to Duo who was with Kaze watching to see what Heero would do* Hello, my name is Relena Peacecraft. *Smile and sticks out his hand like a handshake*
Duo: Um… Yeah. Hi Relena. *Kaze covers her mouth with her hand to stop herself from laughing*
Heero: Oh, hello. I'm Relena. And who are you?
Kaze: *shoots look to Duo and Duo gives her a nod* I'm Heero Yuy.
Heero: Heero… Yuy? (Remember who Heero thinks he is) Oh Heero! *Heero tries to grab Kaze but she runs away VERY fast* Heero, where did you go? *Goes and wanders off calling `Come and get me Heero!'*
Duo: *suddenly bursts out laughing in the hall and Kaze shows up behind him*
Kaze: *smacks him on the back of his head* It wasn't that funny.
Duo: Yes it was! *Keeps laughing*
Kaze: Hey! Let's give some of the Cheetos to Trowa!
Duo: Yeah! *They run off to get the Cheetos and go over to Trowa*
Chapter eight ~~~Trowa's turn~~~
Kaze: Hey Trowa what're you doing?
Trowa: What does it look like? I'm playing with Sunshine. *Cat `meows'*
Kaze: Sounds tiring. You should eat something to keep up your energy. Here have some Cheetos. *Hands him the bowl*
Trowa: Why are you giving me Cheetos?
Kaze: Because… um… you look hungry.
Trowa: Oh, o.k. Cheetos! *Trowa eats a handful and…* Meow!
Kaze: *hysterical laughing*
Trowa: Meow? *Crawls over to Sunshine and starts to act like a little cat with the lion in it's cage*
Duo: *runs over and slams the door of the cage shut and locks it*
Trowa: Meow! *And starts to `play' with the lion*
Duo and Kaze: *even harder laughing again*
Chapter nine ~~~ the next victims ~~~
Duo: That leaves Kaji and Wufei.
Kaze: I got the Cheetos. Let's go. *They run off to where Kaji and Wufei are fighting (again)*
Kaji: Justice freak! Now suffer my wrath!
Wufei: Weak woman! Shut up!
Kaji: No! You loser *rushes to attack Wufei*
Kaze: Hi Kaji!
Kaji: What?! *Messes up what she was doing so she falls*
Wufei: Ha ha! Weakling!
Duo: Hi Wufei!
Wufei: Go away braid boy. Every time you get near me something bad happens.
Kaji: I must remember that.
Kaze: ANYWAY! What's up?
Kaji: Is it that hard to notice baka. I'm fighting with that…Wuffie.
Wufei: *mumbles something about that name*
Duo: Oh. Want some Cheetos?
Kaji and Wufei *at same time*: Why are you giving us Cheetos?
Duo: Because… they taste good and I thought you might want some.
Kaji: O.k! *Eats a handful and the results are…*
Wufei: *gives Duo a funny look but grabs some Cheetos and eats them at the same time Kaji did (now my fun begins)*
Kaji: *with much enthusiasm* Wuffie! (Who has the video camera now?)
Wufei: Kaji! *Both give each other a big hug (hee… Hee… hee…)*
Kaze: *starts laughing along with Duo* they actually LIKE each other!
Duo: I guess that's all they needed! *Kaji and Wufei skip off holding hands and singing `I love you…'*
Chapter ten ~~~When Gundam Pilots know what just happened…~~~
*The next day*
Mariel: What a head ach! What happened? *Looks at her clothes* AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! WHY IN THE %&$@ AM I DRESSED LIKE THIS????
~~~Warp~~~
Kaji: AAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!! Wufei! How dare you touch my hand!?!?
Wufei: What are you talking about woman?
~~~Warp~~~
Trowa: Down Sunshine! Down! Somebody let me outta this cage!
~~~Warp~~~
Uranus: *tick, tick, tick, tick..* AAAHHHH! A bomb! How the heck did this get here?! *Takes it and throws it out of the house while it's still ticking and it blows up when it lands*
~~~Warp~~~
Heero: Huh? Why am I wearing a dress?
~~~Warp~~~
Quatre: Owie. Why am I in Georgia?
Rashid: Only you know that Master Quatre.
~~~Warp~~~
Duo: *snore* (he's asleep `cause it's really early in the morning. Like 5:00 a.m.)
~~~Warp~~~
Kaze: *sitting and watching the video of all the things that happened yesterday (Kaji taped the others besides her's) and laughing hysterically
[Time card, release and dispel… Now it's like noon and all the pilots that ate the Cheetos are talking]
Heero: What in the hell happened yesterday?
Quatre: I don't know but the last thing I remember is eating those Cheetos Kaze and Duo gave us.
Kaji: Me too.
Mariel: Same here.
Trowa: So obviously those weren't normal Cheetos. *Lots of band-aids all over*
Wufei: Yes. I think they have done some horrible injustice this time.
Kaji: Shut up justice freak!
Wufei: You first woman!
Quatre: Quit arguing about that! *also has lots of band-aids*
Kaji and Wufei *at same time*: What?
Uranus: *smacks her forehead*
Kaze: Hey guys, what's up? *Duo is right next to her*
Other pilots: *glare*
Duo: Ah! What'd we do?
Mariel: You know. What was with those Cheetos?
Quatre: Yeah. What's the big idea?
Kaji: *whips out a sword* Please tell us.
Kaze: You really wanna know what happened?
Heero: Yes you dimwits!
Duo: Positive?
Uranus: Yes! Now tell us, what was in those Cheetos.
Kaze: Hallucinogenics.
All pilots: WHAT?!
Duo: She said `Hallucinogenics'.
Mariel: *gets up and suddenly shoots a whole lot of water out of her hands that sends Duo and Kaze through three or four walls but of course not killing them* (like Wolverine in X-men!)
Others: *clap*
Uranus: *gets up and drags them both back into the room by their shirt collars*
Kaze: Ouch.
Kaji: Very well done Mariel.
Mariel: Thank you. I think they deserved it don't you?
Uranus: That's not all they've got coming. You thinking what I'm thinking?
Others: YES!
Chapter eleven ~~~Payback Time~~~
Trowa: Where'd they leave those Cheetos? *Goes to look for them and comes back in a few minutes with the remaining Cheetos in the bowl*
Heero: *walks up and shoves some Cheetos down their throats then the remaining pilots drag them off to the nearest Oz base. Kaji of course has the video camera (again) (cough, chough, Madison, cough)*
Mariel: THIS will be interesting.
Kaze and Duo: *hallucinogenics kick in and they yell out at the top of their lungs while running around* WE'RE GUNDAM PILOTS IN AN OZ BASE! WE'RE GUNDAM PILOTS IN AN OZ BASE!
Lady Une: Get those pilots fools! *Soldiers scatter around trying to catch them and eventually do their job* Bring them to the prisons!
Soldier: Yes ma'am! *Salutes and Duo and Kaze are dragged off to a prison cell the whole time yelling really weird things*
[Where'd I put that time card? Oh here it is. Time Card… Release and Dispel! The next day… (No more Cheeto influence)]
Kaze: Oh my head? Where are we?
Duo: *groan* Good question. The last thing I remember was a lot of water. How `bout you?
Kaze: The same. I think the others decided to pay us pack this time. Wonder if they just handed us over to Oz or if we had some of the Cheetos.
Duo: Cheetos. They wouldn't just hand us over like that.
Kaze: I'm not too sure. Let's go anyway. *Grabs Duo's little bobby pin/ lock pick thingy out of his hair and gets rid of the handcuffs.
Lady Une: *from doorway* Good to see you.
Kaze: You again? Didn't you get enough of us the first time?
Lady Une: Oh no. You're the Purple Chicken Dance one aren't you?
Kaze: *evil smile* Yup.
Lady Une: AAAHHHHHH!! Leave. Just go! You can kill Mr. Treis if you want to! Just stay out of my life! You already made it necessary for me to have a hearing aid!
Kaze: Oh I did? *Looks innocent as an angel (with a set of throwing knives)* before we go… here. *Hands Lady Une some left over Cheetos that were in her pocket.
Lady Une: Why are you giving me Cheetos?
Kaze: Because I feel like it! Now eat them!
Lady Une: *does what she's told for some reason and runs off to who knows where*
Kaze *to Duo*: Ready to go?
Duo: Yeah.
Chapter twelve ~~~The end~~~
Kaze *to Kaji the next day*: Well that was fun.
Kaji: Oh yes it was. The video is perfect blackmail for later as well.
Kaze: Is that the only way you think?
Kaji: Yes. Do you have a point?
Kaze: Just curious.
The End
By:
Kaze Taka
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