My Recovery

<body topmargin=0 leftmargin=0 marginheight=0 marginwidth=0> <table cellpadding=0 cellspacing=0 border=0><tr> <td valign="top" rowspan="2" width=210 BGCOLOR="#9999FF" TEXT="#080000" bgproperties="fixed" background="06a76ba3.gif"> <div> I am Responsible</div> <div> <IMG SRC="520578d0.gif" border=0 width="87" height="141" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></div> <div> For the readiness to take full consequences of our past actions, and to take full responsibility for the well-being of others at the same time, is the very spirit of Step Nine</div> <div> TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p 87</div> <div> In recovery, and through the help of a 12 step group, I learn that the very thing I fear is my FREEDOM. It comes from my tendency to recoil from taking responsibility for anything: I deny, I ignore, I blame, I avoid. Then one day I look, I admit, I accept. The freedom, the healing and the recovery I experience is in the looking, admitting and accepting. I learn to say, "Yes I am responsible." When I can speak those WORDS with honesty and sincerity, Then I am free.</div> <bR> <div>   <script language="JavaScript">  </script>   </div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> </td> <td valign="top" colspan=2 height=90 BGCOLOR="#99CCFF" TEXT="#080000" bgproperties="fixed" background="06b76bc1egdyqn.gif"> <div> <FONT SIZE="1" COLOR="#BF0000" FACE="Arial" ><I><B><U>One day at a time.</U></B></I></FONT><I><B><U>  </U></B></I><FONT SIZE="1" COLOR="#00BF00" FACE="Arial" ><I><B><U>Easy does it.</U></B></I></FONT><I><B><U>  </U></B></I><FONT SIZE="1" COLOR="#BFBF00" FACE="Arial" ><I><B><U>Let go and let God.</U></B></I></FONT><I><B><U> </U></B></I><FONT SIZE="1" COLOR="#9999FF" FACE="Arial" ><I><B><U> Keep comming back.</U></B></I></FONT><I><B><U>  </U></B></I><FONT SIZE="1" COLOR="#6600CC" FACE="Arial" ><I><B><U>Live and let live.</U></B></I></FONT><I><B><U> </U></B></I><FONT SIZE="1" COLOR="#CC6633" FACE="Arial" ><I><B><U>Time. </U></B></I></FONT><I><B><U> </U></B></I><FONT SIZE="1" COLOR="#FFFF33" FACE="Arial" ><I><B><U>Just for today.  </U></B></I></FONT><FONT SIZE="1" COLOR="#666633" FACE="Arial" ><I><B><U>Honesty. </U></B></I></FONT><I><B><U> </U></B></I><FONT SIZE="1" COLOR="#CC6633" FACE="Arial" ><I><B><U>Keep it simple.  </U></B></I></FONT><FONT SIZE="1" COLOR="#9900CC" FACE="Arial" ><I><B><U>But for the Grace of God.</U></B></I></FONT><I><B><U> </U></B></I><FONT SIZE="1" COLOR="#CC6699" FACE="Arial" ><I><B><U> It works if you work it.</U></B></I></FONT><I><B><U> </U></B></I><FONT SIZE="1" COLOR="#A0A0A4" FACE="Arial" ><I><B><U>Turn it over. </U></B></I></FONT><I><B><U> </U></B></I><FONT SIZE="1" COLOR="#990066" FACE="Arial" ><I><B><U>Nothing changes if nothing changes.</U></B></I></FONT><I><B><U> </U></B></I><FONT SIZE="1" COLOR="#336600" FACE="Arial" ><I><B><U> Alcohol kills the pain,  the joy,  the hope, the body,  the brain, and finally the soul.</U></B></I></FONT><I><B><U> </U></B></I><FONT SIZE="1" COLOR="#FF9966" FACE="Arial" ><I><B><U>Our minds are a dangerous  place to be alone.</U></B></I></FONT><I><B><U>  We can do what I cannot do alone.</U></B></I><I><B><U>     </U></B></I><FONT SIZE="1" COLOR="#000033" FACE="Times New Roman" ><B><U>(</U></B><B><U>See list  on bottom of pages for the rest of my story.)  </U></B></FONT><FONT SIZE="1" COLOR="#0000CC" FACE="Times New Roman" ><B>Back to   </B><A HREF="index.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Home"><U><B>home</B></U></A><B> </B></FONT></div> <div> </div> </td> </tr><tr> <td valign="top" height=390 colspan=2 BGCOLOR="#99CCFF" TEXT="#080000" bgproperties="fixed" background="06b76ba3.gif"> <div> <B>My Recovery</B></div> <div> <B><IMG SRC="3c53f0a0.gif" border=0 width="575" height="10" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <bR> <div> <IMG SRC="309778d0.gif" border=0 width="119" height="141" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"><IMG SRC="309778d0.gif" border=0 width="119" height="141" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"><IMG SRC="309778d0.gif" border=0 width="119" height="141" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"><IMG SRC="521578d0.gif" border=0 width="87" height="141" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></div> <bR> <div> <B>June 1, 1978 </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>They say that hurt people hurt people. This was true for me. Where does one go when there is no place left to go? Or when all others seemed to have lost all hope in you. But most of all you have lost hope in yourself. </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>All doors seemed to have been slammed in my face. Or I slammed them shut myself. I couldn't live one more day with what I felt and what I did. I was dying. The guilt, shame and fears had consumed all my waking hours. Even the drugs and booze could no longer make the thoughts and feelings disappear. Was this what bottom felt like? </B><B>I was living a death in life. </B><B>I had managed to push anyone who might have cared far far away from me with my neediness and control and my irresponsibility's. I had become the hopeless professional victim with no hope of change. I drank and used every waking moment. I was lost, alone, and hopeless. I lied. I stole. I cheated. I manipulated. I hurt every one around me. I didn't want to. I didn't know how to stop. I had no choices left in life. I either found help or I was going to really kill myself this time. I thought that there could not be one person in the entire world like me. </B></div> <bR> <DIV ALIGN="LEFT"></DIV> <div> <B><IMG SRC="3ab61550.gif" border=0 width="97" height="85" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B><B><IMG SRC="3ab61550.gif" border=0 width="97" height="85" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"><IMG SRC="3ab61550.gif" border=0 width="97" height="85" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"><IMG SRC="3ab61550.gif" border=0 width="97" height="85" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"><IMG SRC="3ab61550.gif" border=0 width="97" height="85" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <bR> <div> <B>23 years ago I walked into my first recovery group. In 12-step recovery I found a hope that I had never felt before. But first I had to put the booze, and drugs, down and admit I was powerless and ask for help. I had to find a higher power I could live with. Then take the actions to change one thing. My entire way of looking and dealing with life others and myself. I had become willing to pay the price of healthy living. I didn't do this real well the first few years of recovery. In fact it took a while for old habits to die and to hold my head up with dignity and integrity. I have not found it necessary to use drugs or drink since June 1st 1978. For this I am extremely grateful. I never thought I could live a Normal life with out drinking or using. </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Today I am in charge of my actions and choices. I have friends. Not the kind I had to sell my soul for. But real friends. The kind that are honest with me even when I don't want to hear the truth. Those friends didn't sugar coat things for me. No one felt sorry for me. Feeling sorry for me would have killed me. </B><B>In fact there where times when I thought I would die from the realties they were trying to help me face.</B><B> I had to let go of all the (YOU OWE ME's). The score keeping. Yes things had happen to me that I had no power or choice over. Yet I do not have to hurt others anymore or myself because of how I feel today. I am alive and full of feelings. Wow what a change from my old life. I am free to be me today in my entire positive and negatives. I don't have to control my outer circumstances and people today. I only have to stay true to myself and respect others rights to be themselves as well. Life never changed because I wanted it to. Life changed because I changed.</B></div> <bR> <DIV ALIGN="LEFT"></DIV> <div> <B><IMG SRC="16d89b30.jpg" border=0 width="137" height="179" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"> </B></div> <div> <B>May 7th 1994</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>When I quit fighting people, places, and things and let go of controlling as best as I could...my higher power blessed me with the most wonderful man in marriage. My husband is also in recovery. We make a great partnership. I love him so. He loves, respects, and honors me because I learned how to do this for myself in recovery. I have a good life today. I do not regret anything in my past today. In fact everything in my past is being used today to help others find hope as I was helped to find hope and a new way of living.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>If my birth daughter had found me any earlier than she did I would not of been able to handle the emotional roller coster ride with her. Because of God and my recovery I had good boundries as well as good self esteem.</B></div> <bR> <DIV ALIGN="LEFT"></DIV> <div> <B><IMG SRC="271c15b0.jpg" border=0 width="193" height="91" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <div> <B>This is the cake I got for my 21st b-day</B></div> <bR> <div> <B><IMG SRC="522625d0.gif" border=0 width="98" height="93" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <div> <B>June, 1 2001</B></div> <bR> <div> <B><IMG SRC="6824a540.gif" border=0 width="74" height="84" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B><B><IMG SRC="6824a540.gif" border=0 width="74" height="84" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B><B><IMG SRC="6824a540.gif" border=0 width="74" height="84" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B><B><IMG SRC="6824a540.gif" border=0 width="74" height="84" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B><B><IMG SRC="6824a540.gif" border=0 width="74" height="84" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B><B><IMG SRC="6824a540.gif" border=0 width="74" height="84" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B><B><IMG SRC="6824a540.gif" border=0 width="74" height="84" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <bR> <div> <B><IMG SRC="67d6a960.gif" border=0 width="106" height="150" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"><IMG SRC="67e6a960.gif" border=0 width="106" height="150" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"><IMG SRC="67f6c960.gif" border=0 width="108" height="150" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"><IMG SRC="6806c960.gif" border=0 width="108" height="150" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"><IMG SRC="6816c960.gif" border=0 width="108" height="150" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <div> <B>..."as long as you know that you </B></div> <div> <B>know, you will never know, but when you begin to do what we tell you not to do,</B></div> <div> <B> and do, and begin to know that you do not know, then you will begin to </B></div> <div> <B>know!" </B></div> <div> <B>From a 12 step</B></div> <div> <B> Member</B></div> <div> <B>Thanks Patrick for re-sharing a powerful statment.</B></div> <bR> <bR> <div> <B><IMG SRC="3c53f0a0.gif" border=0 width="575" height="10" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <bR> <bR> <div> <B>** </B><B>I want to thank all those who have gone before me in this fight and journey of recovery. Thank you for paving a path of life that I could follow and live free today.  With out you all I would not be alive today.  Especially I want to thank my first sponsor Leonard D.  He was the first person I learned how to trust and love. And all the other old timers that made a big big impact in my life. Oscar O, Woody, Hank,  Bud M, Dale B, Burgess H, Red M, Virg W, Pete, Joe B, Papa Charley, Nick and Deb, Joann, and off course all the new people who continually remind me of who I am and where I came from on a daily bases. </B></div> <div> <B>They say in recovery if you wait long enough someone who is just like you were will walk into recovery. That day came for me about 2/3 years ago. It was like looking into a mirror.</B></div> <div> <B>My sweet new baby Goofy:) We now have become good friends.</B></div> <div> <B>Goofy, I do love you:)</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>A  special big big hug and love to my sponsor's of today,  </B></div> <div> <B>Billy Bob G and Joann</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>  </B><B>(Ginger)</B><B> </B></div> <bR> <div> <B><IMG SRC="340f0970.gif" border=0 width="240" height="151" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <bR> <bR> <div> <B><IMG SRC="3c53f0a0.gif" border=0 width="575" height="10" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> <B><IMG SRC="28a62680.gif" border=0 width="354" height="104" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <bR> <div> <B><IMG SRC="28b15610.gif" border=0 width="277" height="97" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <bR> <div> <B><IMG SRC="69cc80d0.gif" border=0 width="200" height="13" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B><B><IMG SRC="69cc80d0.gif" border=0 width="200" height="13" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <bR> <div> <B><IMG SRC="6afc8680.gif" border=0 width="200" height="104" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <div> <B>Friends of B&B</B></div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> <B><IMG SRC="3c53f0a0.gif" border=0 width="575" height="10" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> <B>My Guest book</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>I invite each of you to sign my guest book.</B></div> <div> <B>or send me an E-mail </B></div> <div> <B>I would like to know what you are thinking,</B></div> <div> <B>how my web site affected you, </B></div> <div> <B>what you felt when you read MY STORY, </B></div> <div> <B>and any additional comments you may have. </B></div> <div> <B>Thank you, Ginger </B></div> <bR> <div> <B><IMG SRC="3c53f0a0.gif" border=0 width="575" height="10" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div>  <CENTER><P> <A href="http://pub47.bravenet.com/guestbook/show.asp?usernum=3952344062&cpv=1"> <IMG src="http://images.bravenet.com/pub/viewbook.gif" border="0" width="100" height="35"></A> <A href="http://www.bravenet.com/"> <IMG src="http://images.bravenet.com/pub/gbook.gif" border="0" width="100" height="35"></A> </CENTER>  </div> <div> <B><IMG SRC="40473650.gif" border=0 width="115" height="101" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <div> <A HREF="mailto:lalinda@home.com" TARGET="_top" TITLE="mailto:lalinda@home.com"><U><B>mailto:lalinda@home.com</B></U></A></div> <bR> <bR> <div> <B><IMG SRC="3c53f0a0.gif" border=0 width="575" height="10" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <bR> <bR> <div> <B><IMG SRC="2495e750.jpg" border=0 width="94" height="117" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <div> <B>A tribute to a friend I </B><FONT SIZE="1" COLOR="#CC3366" FACE="Arial" ><B>loved and still do dearly. </B></FONT><B> You will always be in my heart dear:)</B></div> <div> <B> Because of an unmanageable,</B></div> <div> <B>we lost this wonderful friendship.</B></div> <div> <B>There has not been a day when I have not thought of you sweetie.</B></div> <bR> <bR> <div> <B><IMG SRC="3c53f0a0.gif" border=0 width="575" height="10" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <bR> <bR> <div> <A HREF="http://whatiscopyright.org/" TARGET="_top" TITLE="http://whatiscopyright.org/"><U><IMG SRC="18eb2240.gif" border=0 width="178" height="36" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></U></A></div> <div> <B>Dancing In the Fire of Reunion is owned by Ginger. </B></div> <div> <B> You may not reproduce any of my stories, my poems</B></div> <div> <B>or my pictures in part or in whole without the </B></div> <div> <B>express written permission of Ginger.</B></div> <div> <B>Please e-mail me if you want something off my site:)</B></div> <bR> <bR> <div> <B><IMG SRC="3c53f0a0.gif" border=0 width="575" height="10" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> <A HREF="id25.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Hello"><U><B><IMG SRC="35c65620.jpg" border=0 width="101" height="98" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></U></A><B>  </B><A HREF="id23.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="My Brother and Myself"><U><B><IMG SRC="35d63620.jpg" border=0 width="99" height="98" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></U></A><B>  </B><B><IMG SRC="35e64620.jpg" border=0 width="100" height="98" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <div> <B>Click on buttons above to move from page to page</B></div> <div> <B>or</B></div> <div> <B>|</B></div> <div> <B>|</B></div> <div> <B>Click any of the titles below to start:)</B></div> <bR> <div> <A HREF="id17.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="The Beginning"><U>The Beginning</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id18.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE=" My Young Years"><U>  My Young Years</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id19.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="The Foster Homes"><U>The Foster Homes</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id20.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="The Loss of my Child"><U>The Loss of my Child</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id21.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Unwed Mothers Home"><U>Unwed Mothers Home</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id22.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Empty Soul"><U>Empty Soul</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id29.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Memorial to Gingers Parents"><U>Memorial to Ginger's Parents</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id39.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Send in the Clowns"><U>Send in the Clowns</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id30.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Come and set on my Knee"><U>Come and set on my Knee</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id23.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="My Brother and Myself"><U>My Brother and Myself</U></A>   |   <B>My Recovery</B>   |   <A HREF="id25.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Hello"><U>Hello</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id26.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Getting to Know You"><U>Getting to Know You</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id27.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Our Honeymoon"><U>Our Honeymoon</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id28.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Real Love Never Dies"><U>Real Love Never Dies</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id31.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Going to another Place"><U>Going to another Place</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id35.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Once Upon A Time"><U>Once Upon A Time</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id32.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="A Memorial to my Husbands Father"><U>A Memorial to my Husbands Father</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id38.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="An Ending a Beginning"><U>An Ending a Beginning</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id34.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Ode to Joy "><U>"Ode to Joy" </U></A>   |   <A HREF="id37.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="My Familys Pictures "><U>My Family's  Pictures </U></A>   |   <A HREF="id45.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Links, Search Engines"><U>Links, Search Engines</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id46.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Birthmothers in Faith "><U>Birthmothers in Faith </U></A>   |   <A HREF="id47.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="A Tribute to my Only Son"><U>A Tribute to my Only Son</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id62.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="My Sweet Aunt Jorja"><U>My Sweet Aunt Jorja</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id63.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="My Sweet Daughter Jacquie"><U>My Sweet Daughter Jacquie</U></A></div> <bR> <div> <B>Back to </B>  <A HREF="index.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Home"><U>home</U></A><B> </B></div> <bR> <bR> <div> <B><IMG SRC="3c53f0a0.gif" border=0 width="575" height="10" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <bR> <bR> <div> <B> <script language=javascript src="http://ss.webring.yahoo.com/navbar?f=j&y=rrutul&u=98168949410248348"></script>  </B></div> <bR> <bR> <div> <B><IMG SRC="3c53f0a0.gif" border=0 width="575" height="10" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> <B>****NOTE****</B></div> <div> <B>This is a song that states how I felt when I was using and drinking.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B><IMG SRC="3416eaa0.gif" border=0 width="110" height="170" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <div> <B><U>Comfortably Numb </U></B></div> <div> <B>as sung by Pink Floyd</B></div> <bR> <div> Hello?</div> <div> Is there anybody in there?</div> <div> Just nod if you can hear me.</div> <div> Is there anyone at home?</div> <div> Come on, now,</div> <div> I hear you're feeling down.</div> <div> Well I can ease your pain</div> <div> Get you on your feet again.</div> <div> Relax.</div> <div> I'll need some information first.</div> <div> Just the basic facts.</div> <div> Can you show me where it hurts?</div> <bR> <bR> <div> There is no pain you are receding</div> <div> A distant ship, smoke on the horizon.</div> <div> You are only coming through in waves.</div> <div> Your lips move but I can't hear what you're saying.</div> <div> When I was a child I had a fever</div> <div> My hands felt just like two balloons.</div> <div> Now I've got that feeling once again</div> <div> I can't explain you would not understand</div> <div> This is not how I am.</div> <div> I have become comfortably numb.</div> <bR> <bR> <div> O.K.</div> <div> Just a little pinprick.</div> <div> There'll be no more aaaaaaaaah!</div> <div> But you may feel a little sick.</div> <div> Can you stand up?</div> <div> I do believe it's working, good.</div> <div> That'll keep you going through the show</div> <div> Come on it's time to go.</div> <bR> <bR> <div> There is no pain you are receding</div> <div> A distant ship, smoke on the horizon.</div> <div> You are only coming through in waves.</div> <div> Your lips move but I can't hear what you're saying.</div> <div> When I was a child </div> <div> I caught a fleeting glimpse</div> <div> Out of the corner of my eye.</div> <div> I turned to look but it was gone</div> <div> I cannot put my finger on it now</div> <div> The child is grown, </div> <div> The dream is gone.</div> <div> I have become comfortably numb.</div> <bR> <div> <I><B><U>*** Thank God and my recovery I don't ever have to feel this way again***</U></B></I></div> <bR> <bR> <div> <B><IMG SRC="3c53f0a0.gif" border=0 width="575" height="10" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> <B><IMG SRC="3d778640.gif" border=0 width="120" height="100" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <bR> <bR> <div> <B> <embed src="HTMLobj-649/onedayatatime.mid" autostart="true" loop="true" width="145" height="70">  </B></div> <div>     <script language=javascript>var Loaded=false;var Flag=false;</script> <script src='http://files.cometsystems.com/javascript/lc2000.js' language=javascript></script> <script language=javascript>if(Loaded&&Flag)TheCometCursor('wildlife_buffalo',0,626);</script>   </div> <bR> <div>   <script language="JavaScript">  </script>   </div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> </td> </tr></table></body>