Where do I begin.  This isn't the longest story in the world but it might show you an insight into what type of men I am always attracted to.

One night a friend of mine from work and I went out with a mutual friend of ours.  As we were leaving  the club this man caught my attention.  He was 6'3-6"5.  He was gorgeous.

I guess he must have seen me looking at him, because outside the club he asked for my phone number which I gave up quickly.

The next day he called.  He had the sexiest deepest voice I had ever heard.  I miss that voice sometimes.

He came over and spent the night.  He was such a presence.  I still can see him sitting on my couch.  I think he was the sexiest, more perfectly built man I have ever met.

After being with him, I changed all my ideas about what I wanted in a man physically.  The biggest thing is to have a man that is tall.  I love tall men.  Tall, handsome men.  I wish the world was full of them.

Things were going really well.  We were seeing alot of each other.  I basically knew that he was seeing other women.  He lived about an hour away.  I was still with Will.  I really didn't think the relationship was about much but sex.  Sex was great.  We didn't go anywhere together.  We didn't do anything besides have sex.

I remember one day he came over to the house and said he knew my ex.  He had ran into an old friend of his, who happened to be a dope smokin' buddy of my ex's.  I guess Mr. Nastyman at one time or another sold stuff to my ex. 

My ex of course denied knowing him.  I think he did, and he hated the thought of us being together.

One four day weekend I decided to go to San Antonio to see my friend Shorty and invited Mr. Nasty to come along.  He said he would met me there.  He couldn't make it the first night, but called the next day from San Marcos.  He picked up a pair of shoes for my son.  He finally made it.  We had a blast hanging out with all the people over at Shorty's and the drinks were flowing thanks to Mr. Nastyman.  He made really good money and spent it like it was water.

We decided to go out to this place called Park Place.  He had this thing he wanted me to do.    Sleep with him and another girl.  I was trying to please him.  I was always over compensating when it came to him.  So I told him I would try to see if I could pick a girl up at this club.  It wasn't happening.  So we decided to venture to a gay club.  My ex and I helped pay the mortage at this club for the year we lived in San Antonio.  I couldn't do it.  He was upset because all I would talk to was the men.  I had fun.  We danced a couple dances even.  It was great.  I had the best time of my life.

We left that club and went back to the first place.  He was talking to girls and had been all night.  I guess he was just trying to get someone for us, but I took it as disrespect in a way.  I took it as a sign that we weren't as close as I thought we were.  I don't know.  Even to this day, I am unsure.  Maybe someday it will come to me.  I probably shouldn't even wonder about it.

He left to use the bathroom and I flirted with a guy.  He walked out on us.  I tried to explain that he was just asking for a light or something.  Mr. Nastyman went the hell off.  He started to leave without me.  I was so drunk I wasn't thinking straight.  I chased him in the parking lot.  He pushed me down on the ground.  No one puts his hands on me.  I just was trying to get a ride home.  He let me get in the car, and he drove fast back to Shorty's house.  I tried talking to him but he wasn't listening.  When we finally made it back to Shorty's house.  He got out of the car, came over to my door and pulled me the rest of the way out and pushed me again. 

I said it once.  You don't put your hands on me.  I threw the diet Coke bottle I had at his door, and then I kicked his door.  I can't believe that I did it.  I thought he was going to kill me right there, right then.  This is one mean guy.  He had a good job, but he was straight up thug.  He always had a piece with him.  He was so easily angered.  I was terrified.

I got inside the house.  I called him on his cellular phone, over and over again.  He claimed that he called the police on me.  I told him that after I came down off my drunk I would never call him again.

He called me couple weeks later.  It probably was sooner than that.  I can't remember which things happened where or when, but he came over that night.  He was planning on spending the night somewhere else and stated that if it didn't work out he would be back.  He didn't come back that night.  Not much longer after that he did come.  He spent the night.  I left him in the morning.  He called my 1SG and told him about the dent in the door.  Tried calling the BN Commander.  They all told him to take me to small claims court.

I was still really scared of this guy.  I had my son sleeping with me.  I was afraid of a drive by.  He a gone to court over beating an ex girlfriend and her boyfriend.  He was crazy.

When he would call I would let him come over.  My friends thought I was crazy, but I had to do what I had to do.

One night we had along talk about the things that had gone on in the past.  He told me that if he didn't care something about me he would have never came and spent as much time as he was with me.  He had even at one time asked me to get out of the Army and move to Round Rock to live with him.  All I had to do was work or go school.  He actually wasn't upset about his car.  He had a really nice car with this big dent in the door.

I was letting a great friend of mine stay here while he finished clearing post before he went to Germany and Mr. Nastyman called.  He wanted me to come to Round Rock and spend the night.  I told him I would call him back if I found someone to watch my son.  My friend said he would as long as I got him ready for bed first.

I was on my way to Round Rock, and a new chapter to the book.  He had a beautiful apartment.  I always wondered if a woman decorated it or not.   It was really strange.  I would come down and spend the night and go home the next morning.

One day I called him and he just went off about nothing, and told me he would talk to me later when I wasn't tripping.  I never heard from him again.  I guess this was a pretty boring story. 

May 23, 1999

Update. 

Last Sunday Mr. Nastyman called me.  It was fairly out of the blue.  He said he had just sobered up since the last time I had seen him, which was in March sometime I think.  Anyway, he called again Friday night and then came over.  I wasn't really sure how to handle him, but we did the do, and actually had a conversation.  Can you imagine that?  He told me that he cared about me, even though he didn't show it like other "cats". I had told him earlier that evening about BeLaTN, and he tried to act like he owned me, but got over it.  He said he was going to ask me to come to Dallas to visit and to send me a plane ticket to Miami.  Sounds fishy I know.  He quit his job, so we can just imagine what he is doing now.  Who really cares, as long as he don't bring it my way.  We'll see where all this leads to anyway.