Redneck
The backwoods couple was delighted when finally their long wait to adopt a baby came to an end. The adoption center called and told them they had a wonderful Japanese boy, and the couple took him without hesitation.
On the way back home, they stopped by the local college to enroll in night courses.
After they filled out the form, the registration clerk inquired, "May I ask you a question? What ever possessed you to study Japanese?"
The backwoodsman said proudly,---In a year or so, our adopted son will start to talk. We want to be able to understand him."
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A guy in a bar leans over to the guy next to him and says, "Wanna hear a redneck joke?"
The guy next to him replies, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something. I'm 6' tall, 200 lbs. and a redneck. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2", 225 lbs. and a redneck. The fella next to him is 6'5", 250 lbs. and a redneck. Do you still want to tell that joke?"
The first guy says, "Nah. I don't want to have to explain it three times."
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Bubba and Clem find three hand grenades and decide to take them to the police station.
"What if one of them explodes before we get there?" asks Clem.
"Don't worry about it," says Bubba.
"We'll just lie and tell them we only found two."
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