Joke Of The Week

<body topmargin=0 leftmargin=0 marginheight=0 marginwidth=0> <table cellpadding=0 cellspacing=0 border=0 height="100%"><tr> <td valign="top" width=168 BGCOLOR="#FFFFFF" TEXT="#080000"> <div> <IMG SRC="d4582b40.gif" border=0 width="130" height="180" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></div> <bR> <div> <A HREF="mailto:JpCantrell2000@aol.com" TARGET="_top" TITLE="mailto:JpCantrell2000@aol.com"><U><IMG SRC="d467c490.gif" border=0 width="124" height="73" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></U></A></div> </td> <td valign="top" BGCOLOR="#000000" TEXT="#F7F7FF"> <div> <FONT SIZE="5" COLOR="#FFFFFF" FACE="Arial" ><B>Cantrell Family Website</B></FONT>     |   <A HREF="index.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Cantrell Family Website"><U><B>home</B></U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id25.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="John Cantrell"><U>John Cantrell</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id174.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Cantrell Family Tree"><U>Cantrell Family Tree</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id57.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Cantrell photo album"><U>Cantrell photo album</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id149.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Cantrell Family Holiday Pages"><U>Cantrell Family Holiday Page's</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id27.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Native Americans "><U>Native Americans </U></A>   |   <A HREF="id214.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="SUPPORT OUR TROOPS"><U>SUPPORT OUR TROOPS</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id106.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="An Angel"><U>An Angel</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id196.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="its been a while"><U>it's been a while</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id220.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Money"><U>Money</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id183.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="faire maidens "><U>faire maiden's </U></A>   |   <A HREF="id179.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="My Garden Page"><U>My Garden Page</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id193.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="My Pets"><U>My Pet's</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id26.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="POETRY"><U>POETRY</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id3.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Fantasy Art Gallery"><U>Fantasy Art Gallery</U></A>   |   <B>Joke Of The Week</B>   |   <A HREF="id6.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Contact John Cantrell"><U>Contact John Cantrell</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id188.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Guest Book"><U>Guest Book</U></A></div> <bR> <bR> <div> <B>Joke Of The Week</B></div> <bR> <DIV ALIGN="LEFT"></DIV> <div> <B><IMG SRC="d4271480.gif" border=0 width="369" height="72" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> <B> <TABLE BORDER="5" CELLPADDING="2" CELLSPACING="1" WIDTH="445" BORDERCOLORLIGHT="#FFFFFF" BORDERCOLORDARK="#808080" FRAME="BOX" RULES="ALL" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" > <tR> <tD VALIGN=TOP HEIGHT= 577 WIDTH="427"><div>  </div> <bR> <bR> <DIV ALIGN="LEFT"></DIV> <div> <B>How Big An 'Ol Boy Are Ya!</B></div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> <B>Earl was enjoying his normal Saturday afternoon activities, (watching bass fishing, eating pork rinds, and drinking Pabst Blue Ribbon) when his wife came storming in the trailer. </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>"I want you to get up and kick this guy's ass!" she exclaimed. </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Earl, being a man of pride, jumped up and said, "What did that bastard do to you?" </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>She said, "Well I was at the market and I dropped a melon, when I went down to pick it up he looked under my dress." </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Earl was fuming now! </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Then he looked me in the eyes and said, "I would like to fill you up with ice cream and eat it all up!" </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Hearing this Earl immediately sat back down. </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>She replied, "Well aren't you gonna do something?" </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Earl looked at her and said, "I'm not gonna fuck with anyone who can eat that much ice cream."</B></div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> </tD> </tR> </TABLE></B></div> <bR> <div> <B> <TABLE BORDER="5" CELLPADDING="2" CELLSPACING="1" WIDTH="443" BORDERCOLORLIGHT="#FFFFFF" BORDERCOLORDARK="#808080" FRAME="BOX" RULES="ALL" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" > <tR> <tD VALIGN=TOP HEIGHT= 792 WIDTH="425"><bR> <bR> <div> <B>My all time favorite Joke so far </B></div> <div> <B>since I love Harley's</B></div> <bR> <bR> <div>  <FONT SIZE="3" COLOR="#FFFFCC" FACE="Arial" ><B>Arthur Davidson, of the Harley Davidson Motorcycle Corporation, dies </B></FONT></div> <div> <B>and goes to heaven. At the gates, an angel tells Davidson, </B></div> <div> <B>"Well, you've been such a good guy and your motorcycles have changed the world. As a </B></div> <div> <B>reward, you can hang out with anyone you want to in Heaven." </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Davidson thinks about it and says, "I wanna hang out with God, Himself."</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>The befeathered fellow at the Gates takes Arthur to the Throne Room and </B></div> <div> <B>introduces him to God. Arthur then asks God, </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>"Hey, aren't you the inventor of Woman?" God says,  "Ah, yes." "Well," says Davidson, "You </B></div> <div> <B>have some major design flaws in your invention: </B></div> <div> <B>1. There's too much front end protrusion </B></div> <div> <B>2. It chatters at high speeds </B></div> <div> <B>3. The rear end wobbles too much, and </B></div> <div> <B>4. The intake is placed too close to the exhaust."</B></div> <div> <B> </B></div> <div> <B>"Hmmm..." replies God, "hold on." </B></div> <div> <B>God goes to the Celestial Supercomputer, types in a few keystrokes, and waits for the result. </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>The computer prints out a slip of paper and God </B></div> <div> <B>reads it. </B></div> <div> <B>"It may be that my invention is flawed," God replies to Arthur Davidson, </B></div> <div> <B>"but according to My Computer, more people are riding my invention than </B></div> <div> <B>yours."</B></div> <bR> </tD> </tR> </TABLE></B></div> <bR> <div> <A HREF="id200.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Todays funpage"><U><B><IMG SRC="d43c61d0.gif" border=0 width="198" height="29" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id200_click_here.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Todays funpage"><U><B>Click Here</B></U></A></div> <bR> <div> <IMG SRC="9f2acdf0.gif" border=0 width="172" height="223" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></div> <bR> <bR> <div> <TABLE BORDER="2" CELLPADDING="2" CELLSPACING="1" WIDTH="254" BORDERCOLORLIGHT="#FFFFFF" BORDERCOLORDARK="#808080" FRAME="BOX" RULES="ALL" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" > <tR> <tD VALIGN=TOP HEIGHT= 112 ><NOBR><div> <A HREF="id157.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Funny Picture Of The Day"><U><IMG SRC="d95ee6a0.gif" border=0 width="238" height="106" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></U></A></div> </NOBR></tD> </tR> </TABLE></div> <bR> <bR> <div> <B> <embed src="HTMLobj-3400/grandpa.mid" autostart="true" loop="true" hidden="true">  </B></div> <div> <B>Share this page with a Friend</B></div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> <A HREF="index.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Cantrell Family Website"><U><B><IMG SRC="d4782240.gif" border=0 width="130" height="36" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></U></A></div> <bR> </td> </tr></table></body>