Party Tricks

<body topmargin=0 leftmargin=0 marginheight=0 marginwidth=0> <table cellpadding=0 cellspacing=0 border=0 height="100%"><tr> <td valign="top" width=200 BGCOLOR="#003399" TEXT="#080000" background="03fc8c00erkjxk.jpg"> <div> <B>A little bit of fluff...</B></div> </td> <td valign="top" BGCOLOR="#0066CC" TEXT="#080000"> <div> <FONT SIZE="5" COLOR="#99CCFF" FACE="Edwardian Script ITC" ><B>Smiles, Tears, & Happy Endings</B></FONT><FONT SIZE="1" COLOR="#FFFF99" FACE="Arial" > </FONT><FONT SIZE="1" COLOR="#FFFFFF" FACE="Arial" > </FONT><FONT SIZE="1" COLOR="#CC0000" FACE="Arial" > </FONT>  |     <A HREF="index.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Smiles, Tears, Happy Endings"><U>home</U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id19.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Shelleys Stories"><U>Shelley's Stories</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id26.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Boomerang"><U>Boomerang</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id27.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="238 Days"><U>238 Days</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id28.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="A Proposal in Paradise"><U>A Proposal in Paradise</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id29.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Blood Ties"><U>Blood Ties</U></A>   |   <B>Party Tricks</B>   |   <A HREF="id31.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Does Anyone Really Miss Her?"><U>Does Anyone Really Miss Her?</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id44.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="No Time To Be Shocked"><U>No Time To Be Shocked</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id45.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Love Always"><U>Love Always</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id46.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Desperate Times"><U>Desperate Times</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id106.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Finding Our Way Back"><U>Finding Our Way Back</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id107.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Roadblock"><U>Roadblock</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id108.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Finding The Treasure"><U>Finding The Treasure</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id110.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Hey Baby, Lets Go To Vegas"><U>Hey Baby, Let's Go To Vegas</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id186.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="A Matter Of Trust"><U>A Matter Of Trust</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id209.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="A Pleasure Sure"><U>A Pleasure Sure</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id226.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="An Excellent Rookie Season"><U>An Excellent Rookie Season</U></A>   |   <A HREF="id227.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Even Steel Magnolias Cry"><U>Even Steel Magnolias Cry</U></A></div> <div> Party Tricks</div> <bR> <div> "I'm just saying Donna, it can't be done."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Yes it can."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "No it can't."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "I assure you Josh that it most certainly can be done."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "No it can't."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Are you like 5 years old?"</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Fine then. Prove it."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Prove what?"</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Prove that it can be done. Prove that it is possible for a person to </div> <div> stand on their head and </div> <div> drink a beer!"</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "I don't have to prove it."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "See, I knew you couldn't do it."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Fine, but what do I get if I do it?"</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Why should you get anything?"</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Because if you are gonna make me prove it, I want something. I want </div> <div> tomorrow off."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "No."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Why not?"</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Because tomorrow is Saturday."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Yes a day that is traditionally considered a weekend."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "But I'm not making you work on Sunday."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "So??"</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "So if I give you tomorrow off, that would be two days in a row."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "What was I thinking?"</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "What would you do with two whole days off?"</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "I have no idea. But I would find something to do."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> Do you have a date?"</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "No."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Then what would you do?"</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "I would sleep in, then go shopping, then make myself a real dinner. </div> <div> One that doesn't </div> <div> come out of a takeout container."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Can I come over for dinner?"</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Seeing your boss kind of defeats the purpose of a day off."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Can I?"</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Fine, but only if you promise to leave work at a reasonable hour. I </div> <div> don't want my </div> <div> gourmet dinner to get ruined."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Gourmet?"</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Compared to what you normally eat, it will be gourmet."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "OK it's a deal."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Now what do I get if you can't do it?"</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "You get me here working tomorrow."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "That's not fair! Thats what I get if we don't even bet."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "5 years old again."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "I want coffee for a week."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Fine."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "With refills."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Fine"</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "My you're awfully sure of yourself aren't you Donnatella?"</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "I know my own party trick Josh."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Ok then."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Get me a beer."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "What kind?"</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Doesn't matter. Just make sure it's in a bottle."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Why?"</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "I need something to wrap my lips around"</div> <bR> <bR> <div> Ex..Ex..Excuse me?"</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Get the beer Josh."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Ok. Here you go. Lets see the trick."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Ok."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "No fair, Donna. You're using the wall to hold you up."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "The standing on the head part Josh…that's not really the trick"</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Ok. But don't start whining when that beer starts shooting out your </div> <div> nose…which it </div> <div> will…any second now…Donna!!"</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "What?"</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "You just stood on your head and drank an entire beer."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "I told you I could."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "How do you do that?"</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "It's a secret."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Tell me."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "If I tell you then it won't be a secret anymore."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "I won't tell anybody."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Promise."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "I promise."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Ok. The truth is, I have VERY strong throat muscles and complete </div> <div> control of my gag </div> <div> reflex."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Wow."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Close your mouth Josh."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "I'm just saying…wow."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "I'm leaving now."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Wow."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "See you tomorrow. 6:00 PM. Don't be late or I'm eating without you."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "I'll be there."</div> <bR> <bR> <div> "Oh and Josh...if you want to see me do my party trick again…you'll </div> <div> need to bring </div> <div> something I can wrap my lips around." </div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> E-Mail me: kuebsr@hotmail.com</div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> </td> </tr></table></body>