| Picture not available | Dr.X | Editor in chief | Dr.X is the founder and editor in chief of this wondrous publication. In addition to the Nobel prize and Pulitzer, Dr.X has won many other notable awards in journalism and science. Dr.X is an expert in all fields of knowledge. |
 | Stan Patchley | Senior Correspondent | Stan Patchley is a world renowned journalist who has earned honors for his work covering the Persian Gulf Crisis and the Loch Ness Monster. Patchley is also the author of several mystery novels, including the award-winning Sunset on Brighton Shore. |
 | Hiroshita | Writer, Copy Editor | Hiroshita is credited with being the first to report on the Mt.Fuji Crisis and the proud owner of a chain of Sushi restaurants. |
 | Rene | Correspondent | Rene has been awarded numerous honors for his part in uncovering the Alien Cat plot. He is also the international correspondent for this publication. |
 | Maurice | Correspondent | Maurice is well-known in France as one of the premiere reporters in the world. Maurice was invaluable in uncovering the Alien menace. |
 | Jenkins | Correspondent | Jenkins, of course, is known for her part in discovering the Alien plot. She is also a prized biochemist and master of tae kwon do. |
 | Al Shuper | Al Shuper | Where would the staff softball team be without Al's guidance? Al's leadership provided a focal point for the whole team. |
 | Duncan | Man at arms | Duncan's value is invaluable to the staff as he provides knowledge and experience to the crew. The staff owes many thanks to Duncan. |
