I actually feel lazy. Not necessarily bored. It's my last day of Spring Break. I'm not really doing anything with it. I thought I would be cramming stuff in, as my last day, but not really. I did start reading my Isaac Asimov biography. And I must admit for a science fiction writer, I would have never thought he would actually be funny! Even entertaining. I think I'm enjoying this book of his even more than his novels! But it's huge. There's no way I'll be able to finish it. Or I'll want to finish it. Why is it so hard to read books when you know you have to read it?
I'm just waiting until 6:30 so I can go get myself a sundae. How pathetic is that? Boy, I want some chocolate. Why am I writing this journal entry? Other then the fact that my mom is sitting right in front of our other computer. For who knows how long. A long time. I really would like to use the phone. I watching this comedy thing on comedy central. It's actually funny.
But I don't want to watch TV. I want to use the phone.
I've been having some recent God troubles. Well not really. More like my trouble is with how others perceive me. And I shouldn't be thinking about others. But I can't help not. I don't want to be a poor puppy dog who has lost her way. I don't want my best friend to think I'm really sad. I don't want anyone to know.
I don't want anyone to know that I'm not a Christian. And I found some recent disturbing things recently revolving around the religion and Jesus. A website I found has some pretty convincing research and conflicting Bible passages. Now they're making Jesus out to be this cult person. Even a comparison with the morning star and the devil! Then on my conversation with God boardlist, another member stately points out how you can't believe in the bible and in CWG, and that after really thinking about Jesus Was Wrong!
Jesus is wrong?
Repeat that aloud. Do you not feel like an awful person? I don't know. That's an incredibly bold statement. And it's definitly saying that if he is wrong....then that must mean that I am right. That also feels really wrong. Whatever happened to being humble? I don't know. I'm finding a lot more conflicts with CWG. If Jesus was wrong. Then who knows what else is wrong with CWG; with Neale's filter?
"Tell me all your thoughts on God, cuz I'm on her way to see her."--Dishwalla
