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"And all my instincts, they return
and the grand facade, so soon will burn
without a noise, without my pride
I reach out from the inside…"
-"In Your Eyes"; Peter Gabriel
Heero sighed in slight irritation as he wiped the sweat from his brow for the seventh time, staring at the codes he'd just finished. He was angrier at the fact that the unbearable heat was making it hard to concentrate and all the noise from his sleeping partner wasn't helping any. Normally, he had no problem ignoring Duo's snoring, but in the hot, still air, the sound was practically deafening.
He turned his chair sharply around, ready to snap at the longhaired boy, but realized a moment later that he just couldn't do it. Because of the heat, Duo had managed to kick all the covers off, lying sprawled across the small bed on his back. His long chestnut brown hair tangled around him like a sweat-dampened cloud, the long fringe of bangs plastered to his forehead. His cheeks were flushed just enough to show off his long, dark eyelashes and there was a light sheen of sweat covering his lithe, boxer-clad form.
Heero couldn't stop himself from smiling when a clump of hair fell across Duo's face, making the other pilot contort his features into an absolutely hilarious expression. Still asleep, Duo's hand smacked at the offending hair, doing absolutely nothing to remove it. Instead, another clump of hair fell directly into his mouth. Heero stood up when he saw that happen, not wanting to be responsible for allowing Duo to choke to death on his own hair.
When it became apparent that Duo didn't realize what he'd just done, Heero made his way over to the bed as quietly as possible, although if Duo hadn't woken up yet, there was little chance of it happening at all. He reached down and carefully pulled the hair out of the American boy's mouth, then almost as an afterthought, he brushed the rest of the hair out of Duo's face, letting the damp silken threads curl around his fingers. As he combed his fingers through Duo's hair, the sleeping boy smiled slightly in his sleep, the snoring changing to something of a contented purr.
Heero puzzled over that for a moment then realized that was probably the reason that Duo spent so much time every night brushing out his hair. He'd always wondered before why the Deathscythe pilot would get that little half-smile on his face and close is eyes every time he ran the brush through all that hair. Apparently, it was a rather comforting and calming sensation to him. Heero mentally stored that bit of information away to himself, just in case it ever needed to be used.
As he stood to get up, Duo's sleepy voice stopped him in his tracks. "Ne, Heero, what're ya doin' over here?" One blue-violet eye cracked open slightly to look at him, followed by the other. "I thought you'd be spendin' all night with that damn machine of yours." Duo slowly sat up and pushed his hair away from his face, trying to keep the majority of it away from his skin.
Heero kept his face as neutral as always as he answered. "You stopped snoring; you had some hair in your mouth."
Duo's eyes went wide and he touched his fingertips to his lips for a moment before letting them trail down his throat in speculation. "Heero…thanks, man," he said softly, studying the Japanese pilot with kind eyes. "I coulda choked or something…you saved my life."
Heero was a bit taken back at the gratitude in Duo's voice and gaze. He hadn't even thought twice about it; he had just done whatever it had taken to keep Duo alive, namely, getting the hair out of his mouth. "Hn," he replied, not really in the mood to put his usual gruff tone into it. He turned away and started to make his way back over to the desk.
"Heero…wait…" Duo requested softly. "I mean it. Thank you. I mean, I know we kinda watch out for each other when we're fighting and stuff, but you did this…"
"Because it wouldn't so any good if you went and died from something so careless," Heero interjected, not even bothering to turn his head. "You should really keep you hair tied back when you sleep, or cut it."
"No way." Duo's voice turned cold. "There's no way in hell I'm cutting my hair and I can't keep it tied back all the time; it'll fall out." He clutched at the few long tendrils that had worked their way froward again. "I had to fight to keep it once and I'll be damned if I'm gonna let anything happen to it now." He stroked the hair possessively, letting it weave around his fingers and tumble away a moment later, apparently lost in deep thought.
The lost tone in his voice did make Heero turn his head. He saw Duo sitting cross-legged on the bed, playing with his hair, a sad look in his eyes. The normally cheerful pilot was worrying at his lip a little, then closed his eyes, letting his head bow forward, his hair spilling around him like a blanket that he clutched onto, wrapping it around himself. He could hear Duo mumbling something, but couldn't quite make out whether he was talking to himself, or Heero.
"Duo…"
"I mean, I was just a kid, you know?" Duo finally said, a little louder than before, looking up at Heero. There was the barest hint of tears in his eyes as he spoke. "But it was all I had…and Father Maxwell…he let me keep it, even though it wasn't sanitary or easy to take care of. But he told her, he told Sister Helen to let me keep it. No matter how bad it got, he never made me cut it.
"Maybe he should have though," he whispered, looking at the bedsheets. "If he had, I bet I would have run away and then I wouldn't have been there to steal the mobile suit and those bastards wouldn't have bombed the church and they'd still be alive. But he didn't, and they did, so I can't just throw away what he fought to give me. I gotta keep it; do you understand that?" A tear finally streaked its way down his cheek.
"Duo…I didn't mean…" Heero started uncomfortably. He had no idea what to say to that. He had never known for certain that there was a reason behind the braid, although he had suspected it at one point or other.
"Aw, what the hell would sentiment mean to you, anyway?" Duo snorted, scrubbing angrily at his face with the back of his hand. "A perfect soldier like you wouldn't give a rat's ass about anyone or anything outside the mission, right? I bet you didn't even care about the people who raised you."
Duo found himself flat on his back seconds later, Heero pinning him to the bed with murder burning in his deep blue eyes. "Don't. You. Ever. Judge. Me. Again." Heero was fighting to keep himself under control. "Don't you ever think for one second that I don't care," he hissed.
"G-gomen, Heero, I…" Duo stammered, terrified that maybe the Japanese pilot would finally make good on all those threats to kill him. "You just don't act like you care about anything else but the mission, you know? You don't talk to any of us and when you do, it's to tell me to shut up…it's like you'd rather the rest of us weren't even around, so you could do everything without us getting in your way." He knew he was running off at the mouth, but it was all he could think of to possibly keep himself alive at the moment.
Heero's eyes closed and he let go of the grip he had on Duo's wrists. "Sometimes I wish you weren't," he whispered. "That way, you wouldn't get hurt…you wouldn't have to know that you were probably going to die. It's like you said earlier, when we were at the school; you should be able to just be a kid and not have to know that all those girls that giggle after you would probably hate you in they knew you were a gundam pilot."
"But what about…"
"I meant the others, too."
"You didn't let me finish," Duo said gently, looking up at Heero. "I was going to ask 'what about you'? You're just a kid, too. And all those girls don't just giggle after me, you know. Granted, I am the cuter one, but you aren't bad at all. Hell, I bet if I were a girl…" Duo stopped himself right be fore he would say something that would get him punched.
Heero opened his eyes and looked down at Duo, who was turning a lovely shade of crimson at the moment. "If you were a girl, you'd what?" he asked.
"I'd probably chase you all over, too," he replied softly, turning even redder if it was at all possible. He closed his eyes and patiently waited for Heero to finally put an end to his life.
Heero leaned down, a little disturbed by the fact that Duo's eyes were screwed shut. He knew that he had probably scared him, but wanted to let him know that he appreciated Duo's concern for him, in an odd way. There was a strange feeling gnawing at his stomach when he leaned down, brushing his cheek against the other pilot's. "Duo…"
Duo's eyes snapped open and he moved away just far enough to be able to look into those Prussian blue orbs. "Ne, Heero?"
"Shut up," Heero whispered, reaching up to trace the pad of his thumb over Duo's bottom lip. Duo's breath caught in his throat and he couldn't do anything but nod silently, not wanting Heero to stop. Heero's fingers slid across his cheek and tangled gently into his hair. He smiled slightly when he heard the low purr out of Duo's throat as those violet eyes slid closed. He had been right about the calming effect; Duo had relaxed considerably, although his heart was pounding out a rapid tattoo.
Leaning down again, Heero started to nuzzle the space under Duo's ear on his throat, taking in the other boy's scent, inhaling softly. He let his breath play over the already heated skin and felt Duo shudder beneath him. Curiously, he allowed his tongue to flicker out for just a moment, brushing across the hollow there. Duo's head fell back and his fingers tangled into Heero's hair, a low whimper sounding from his throat. Taking the opportunity given to him, Heero leaned in further, brushing his lips over Duo's exposed throat, taking a gentle nip and started to kiss the skin in earnest.
"Mmmmnn…" Duo grasped a handful of Heero's much shorter hair and pulled at it, trying to stop Heero from driving him crazy. Heero stopped abruptly and moved away with a quick motion, taking his hand out of Duo's hair, trying to back away further, but Duo's arms stopped him. Opening his eyes, he saw the troubled look in Heero's and his heart stopped. Heero wanted to do this? He couldn't believe this was happening, but he refused to give it up if it were truly being offered. "Shhh…" he soothed, running his fingers through Heero's hair, tilting his face up.
Closing his eyes again, he gently pressed his lips to Heero's in a soft, tentative kiss. The feeling was unlike anything he'd ever experienced, his stomach tightening, heart pounding, his brain losing any coherent thought and nothing remained but the sensation of the Wing pilot's body crushing him into the mattress. The feeling intensified when, much to his delight, Heero returned the kiss, just as hesitantly.
Heero closed his eyes as well and carefully deepened the kiss, parting his lips just a little to begin with and was pleasantly surprised when Duo's mouth opened, pulling Heero's bottom lip in and began to suck, then softly bit down, sending a jolt through Heero's body. He couldn't stop himself from jerking forward and as soon as their mutual arousals brushed against one another, the kiss became wild, both of them desperately opening their mouths, their tongues twining together, tasting each other as deeply as they could.
Duo's hands snaked around Heero's back, pulling him closer, one sliding down to cup the spandex-clad bottom, thrusting his hips up rhythmically, moaning out loud into Heero's mouth. He abruptly broke the kiss moments later and whispered into his ear, "You need to breathe, Heero."
"Huh?" Heero was light-headed, his eyes unfocussed, barely holding himself above Duo.
"You stopped breathing," the longhaired boy told him, trying to catch his own breath. His eyes were starting to glaze over, be he'd had the sense to pull away when he felt Heero's breath stop.
"So you saved my life," Heero murmured, brushing his lips across Duo's. "I guess we're even."
Duo grinned and flipped Heero onto his back, straddling his hips. "Not hardly," he replied, tugging at Heero's ever-present tank top, pulling it up over his head and dropping it on the floor. "I haven't gotten the chance to thank you for saving mine."
"But I thought you said we save each other's lives all the…" Heero's voice trailed off completely. Duo had bent down and kissed him again, then trailed his lips over to Heero's throat, biting and sucking as his hands slid up over Heero's sides. "Aaaahh…"
Duo smiled again, lifting himself up enough to slide down, leaving a trail of wet kisses down the center of Heero's chest. He moved over, teasing one nipple with his tongue, then started suckling hard. Heero cried out, arching his back, torn between stopping the incredible pleasure that was starting to overwhelm him and just letting Duo do whatever he wanted. His fingers clutched at the sheets beneath them, his muscles straining as Duo's fingers brushed across his stomach.
"Duo…what…"
"Just trust me, Heero," Duo breathed, working his way across Heero's chest once more as his hand slid lower. "Please trust me…" He traced his fingers over the ever-growing mound under his partner's spandex shorts and felt Heero twitch. Lapping at the other nipple, he started to rub his palm ever-so-gently over Heero's erection, then squeezed, eliciting another moan from Heero.
Heero closed his eyes and made his decision. "I trust you." The moment the words left his lips Duo abruptly stopped, sliding off him, lying off to the side. He opened his eyes, wondering what he'd done wrong. Duo had propped himself up on one elbow and was looking down at him with hungry, half-lidded eyes.
"Say that again," he pleaded hoarsely, leaning down closer.
Heero reached up and traced his fingers over Duo's lips. "I trust you, Duo." In return, Duo kissed the tips, drawing one into his mouth and began sucking on it, smiling around the digit when Heero's eyes widened.
"If you liked that," Duo told him with an impish grin. "I think I know something you'll like even more."
"What?" Heero's expression became slightly wary as Duo grinned down at him with a mischievous spark in his eyes.
Duo lowered himself and kissed Heero lazily before speaking. "I thought you said you trusted me, Heero," he purred, trailing kisses down his throat, chest and to his stomach. "Did you change your mind?" He worked his way down, brushing his lips over the hard muscles of Heero's lower abdomen, not bothering to wait for an answer, but rather encouraging a negative response to his question.
"No…"
Duo couldn't stop himself from grinning when he heard the near-whispered response. "Good," he chuckled in a low tone, tugging at the shorts that stood in the way of his object of immediate interest. "Because I want to show you just how thankful I am."
Heero raised an eyebrow. "And just how thankful are…Duo…" he gasped as soon as his shorts were tugged roughly down around his knees. He felt his partner settle in between his legs in the bed, waves of chestnut hair spilling across his legs and stomach. "Just wait and see," Duo replied, running his tongue up the inside of Heero's thighs in short, quick flickers, then let his breath play across the wetted skin. He purposely avoided getting anywhere near Heero's erection, which was swelling and bobbing of it's own accord every time Duo moved and his hair brushed over it. He worked his way down the other side of Heero's leg, enjoying the sharp gasps he was drawing from the Japanese pilot's lips.
Heero's eyes were screwed shut, his teeth clenched. He couldn't stop his hands from working their way down and tangling in Duo's hair again, tugging, trying to urge his tormentor higher. For his troubles, he felt Duo's tongue dart out, brushing over his balls in kittenish licks before sitting up, purposely letting his hair drag along Heero's body. Heero thrust upward into the heavy curtain of hair, trying desperately to get some sort of relief, growling when all he got was a faint tickle as Duo swept his hair off to the side.
"Patience, Heero," Duo teased softly, pulling the shorts off the rest of the way, then quickly removing his own. He questioned himself whether he would be able to control himself at all, but brushed the thought aside as soon as he looked up and was treated to a lovely view of Heero stretched out on the bed, his naked body flushed and definitely aroused. It was a vision Duo was certain he would never forget in this lifetime; it was too beautiful, too achingly tempting for him to continue just looking.
Heero was pleasantly surprised for the second time when he felt Duo's callused hands gently lifting his left foot, carefully rubbing and kneading the undersides with his thumbs. He was horny as all hell, but he couldn't bring himself to tell Duo to stop the footrub. It felt too good to relax, ignoring the heat and his own throbbing need, closing his eyes and enjoying what Duo was doing.
Duo watched carefully as Heero began to relax completely. Moving to the other foot, he repeated the rhythmic process, then began moving up Heero's legs with long, slow strokes on the insides of his legs, once again using his thumbs to exert just enough pressure to the muscle. Working his way up Heero's thighs, he began spreading the prone boy's knees apart, inching forward on his own. Heero was murmuring soft, sleepy moans every now and again, which was just what Duo wanted. If he could relax the perfect soldier just enough, it would make his thank you all the more worthwhile.
Continuing on with his massage, Duo waited until Heero was nearly asleep and only semi-erect. Grinning, he kept his hair out of the way, not wanting to miss Heero's reaction as he bent down and pulled Heero's cock into his mouth. Heero's eyes flew open, his hips jerking up instinctively. Duo kept his lips at the base of Heero's organ, nuzzling at the wiry curls of hair with his nose as his tongue urged it back to life, growing into his mouth and throat. Heero clutched at the sheets, fingers impatiently tugging at them as he rocked his hips, trying to push further into the hot wetness that surrounded him.
"Oh God…Duo…" he moaned out loud, arching his back as Duo slowly drew his lips down Heero's length, his tongue pressing flat against the underside, sucking gently as he did so. Finally reaching the head, he couldn't resist lightly nibbling, just barely scraping his teeth over the swollen purple cap, stabbing the tip of his tongue into the slit at the top. "Unnnngh…Duo…"
Duo positively purred in contentment, knowing that it was him, and no one else drawing those beautiful, low moans and pleas from Heero's throat. And the way Heero said his name drove him out of his mind with lust. It was worth holding off just to hear the normally stoic boy call out to him over and over in hushed whispers, trying desperately to push himself back into Duo's mouth.
"Heero," Duo whimpered when the other boy forcefully pulled him up from his task to kiss him, flipping him on his back so their positions were reversed once again. The two bodies pressed together, lips meeting, claiming each other, teeth biting gently, scraping over hot flesh. Heero pushed forward again, grinding his hips into Duo's, their erections rubbing together, trapped between hard muscle and slick skin. Duo was going absolutely mad with the feeling of being trapped under Heero's body, his own urges growing stronger to the point of agony. "Heero…please…" he moaned, trying to spread his legs out. "I need you inside me…please…"
Heero looked down at Duo, completely confused. What the hell was he talking about? Duo's eyes opened and he tried pulling Heero closer. "Duo…I…" he trailed off, suddenly embarassed by his lack of knowledge. It had been far easier when Duo had taken control of the situation, allowing Heero to study, albiet a bit distracted, what would be expected in return. "I don't know what to do," he finally admitted, turning his gaze away. He would never have admitted any weaknesses whatsoever to anyone else in a million years, but he wanted to know what it would feel like to be closer to Duo than anyone; he already felt it somewhere inside him and the feelings were forcing his body to try and understand that closeness, too.
"Shit, Heero, I'm sorry," Duo murmured. "I guess I never thought about that part." His libido was still screaming at him, but not as badly as it had been moments before. Pulling Heero down again, he kissed the other pilot thoroughly, reaching down between the two of them to grasp Heero's erection, stroking gently.
"I'm gonna get something that we'll need, okay?" he whispered after the kiss was broken. Heero nodded and watched him with an intense gaze as he dug through a small bag of various toiletries and found the tube he'd kept around, just in case anything would ever happen; which he hadn't expected in the first place. "Now, I'm going to need you to help me out, here," he instructed, uncapping the lubricant. Placing a good-sized ammount on Heero's fingertips, he explained what was needed.
"How do it I do that?" Heero asked, staring dubiously at Duo, who had positioned himself of his hands and knees before him, ass in the air, waiting patiently.
"Well, you've pretty much got to use your fingers and just get it all in there," Duo sighed. "And you'll probably have to get a little more, too."
"But won't that hurt?" Heero asked seriously.
"It'll hurt a lot less than you just shoving into me," Duo told him. "Trust me, Heero, that is not a pleasant experience."
"Okay, but tell me if I'm doing it wrong," Heero finally agreed, bringing his fingers to Duo's entrance, cautiously inserting the tip of his index finger. "Is this okay?"
"God, yes," Duo moaned, trying to back onto the probing digit further. "That's just right. Now kinda move it in and out a little and when it feels ready, add another finger."
"How am I supposed to know when it's ready?" Heero questioned, rather entranced by the way his finger would disappear into what felt like an incredibly tight space then pull back out with ease.
"Oh, you'll know," Duo said, rocking back. "Right now would be nice, though…just push and get that stuff in there."
Adding a second finger, Heero paid close attention to Duo's body language and the subtle changes in the American's movements and sounds. Figuring now would be a good time, he added a little more of the lube and carefully twisted the two fingers inside, letting a third trail around the outside, which made Duo squirm and try to shove back once again.
"Damn it, Heero, that tickles," Duo hissed, jerking away reflexively. He turned and faced Heero, squirting a healthy ammount of the jelly onto his palms and began coating Heero's shaft with it, playfully squeezing and tugging, watching Heero's eyes get wide, then start to slide shut. Then, he lay back, pulling Heero with him, guiding him to the tight opening. "Now take it slow and kinda push," he explained.
Heero glanced down, a bit bewildered. "Are you sure that's going to…?" he started, immediately cut off by Duo pulling him forward, one hand cupping the back of his neck, the other wrapping around the small of his back. If the kiss alone hadn't abruptly shut him up, the pressure surrounding his cock definitely did. His entire body arched forward reflexively, driving himself deeper into Duo, who was having no complaints whatsoever. Duo squirmed a bit beneath him to get in a better position to tilt his hips up, forcing all the air from Heero's lungs as vibrant flashes of color burst behind his eyelids. Nothing had ever felt so intense or wonderful in his life. Broken bones were nothing compared to the wild sensations shooting through his body.
Duo bit at his lip, trying to keep from outright screaming. Heero was a bit bigger than he'd first thought, but it wasn't anything he couldn't handle. After all, for Heero, he would gladly take anything. Luckily, even the pain was akin to pleasure and he certainly didn't mind Heero's weight pressing him into the bed again, his sex trapped between them. After a few long moments of Heero not moving at all, his ragged breathing hot against Duo's neck, the American started to rock his hips, just a little, to give Heero a clue as to what was expected. Thankfully, the Perfect Soldier caught on fast.
Heero's mind was jolted back into action when he felt Duo's body start to shift under him. The feeling was even better than before and rather than make Duo do all the work, he took over the situation, making shallow, gentle thrusts. He proped himself up on his arms to watch Duo's face as it contorted in the throes of passion, swollen lips parted wetly, sweat trickling down the sides of his face, bangs plastered to his forehead, violet eyes squeezed shut.
"Oh God, Heero…" he moaned helplessly, clutching at the sheets until they slipped away, grasping at his partner's hips, pulling him closer. His tongue flickered out over his dry lips and they were soon covered by Heero's, the Japanese pilot's own tongue probing into his mouth. Finally, the kiss broke, only to trail across his jaw and neck, Heero making quick nips at his throat. "Please, Heero, do it harder…" he gasped, slamming his hips upward.
"I…" Heero moaned, not bothering to control his body any further and complied. Gripping onto Duo, he plunged himself into the violet-eyed boy again and again, nothing existing but the hot slickness around him and the cries of his partner below him. He could vaguely hear Duo's cries, and another set overlaying, which he presumed were his own, but didn't care. All that mattered was Duo and that very moment. He felt the world begin to gray and every molecule was screaming for release of an excruciating tension.
Suddenly, he felt something hot and sticky spread across his stomach, Duo's body jerking uncontrollably beneath him. Finally, the release he craved hit him all at once in a blinding flash. Time stood still for those few moments of blissful oblivion, unaware of Duo's arms around his neck, the other boy's legs wrapped firmly around his waist, the kiss that started at one point he didn't even remember. All that mattered was the nirvana of the first orgasm he'd had due to someone else's body in contact.
Heero's arms gave out from under him and he collapsed onto Duo, who was still trembling slightly from the aftershocks of his own orgasm. Sighing happily, the American pulled his lover closer, closing his eyes and pressing a kiss to Heero's temple, absentmindedly running his fingers through the other pilot's considerably shorter hair. "Mmmm…" he purred softly. "Thank you, Heero." He tightened his grip and forgot about the war, the heat and everything but Heero curled up with him.
"Hrm?" Heero mumbled, fighting sleep, but too comfortable and sated to move, or really even care what Duo had said, but something inside him wanted to know what Duo was saying to him.
"Thank you," Duo repeated sleepily. "That was…God…I never thought for one second you would ever…shit…"
Heero found himself sitting up and looking down at Duo before he could think about it. "What do you mean?" he asked.
"Well, I guess I never thought I'd be here with you like this," Duo admitted. "Not that I didn't want it, because I did. A lot. I just never thought you cared at all." He looked down, realizing that the earlier conversation had proved him wrong and Duo Maxwell never lied. And even if he did, he knew he would never be able to lie to Heero Yuy.
Heero sighed and nodded. "I guess I just don't want anyone else to get hurt again," he admitted softly. "I was trained to be nothing but a soldier, and then after all of it, I was told to follow my feelings, but I just couldn't. I didn't know how. I don't think I do, now. Damn you, Duo, I was doing things right until you came along!" he snapped helplessly.
Duo reached over and traced a finger down Heero's cheek. "I'm sorry…" he whispered. "But I couldn't just watch you kill yourself like this. You're a kid, too, remember? And if we make it out of this war alive, I'll make you live, no matter what it takes. And that's a promise." With that said, he pulled Heero down for a kiss.
"But what if we don't?" he asked, pulling Duo's head over to rest on his chest, closing his eyes as he felt the other boy curl around him.
"Let's think about that when it happens," Duo replied solidly. "In the meantime, right here, right now, it's just us and nothing else. Let's just be here for right now, Heero. Please?"
"Aa," Heero agreed, burrying his face in Duo's hair. He felt sleep nagging at him and succumbed without a fight. Nothing but us for right now. And I hope you're right…and I'll hold you to that promise.
